Gustavo Arellano

Dear Mexican: Have you noticed how all those guys like Bill O’Reilly, Lou Dobbs and Glenn Beck go on and on about Mexicans and immigration? It seems like they fear the taco truck more than the Taliban. I think they go nuts because some Mexicans look like Arabs or Muslims......

{mosimage}Dear Readers: Muchas , muchas responses to my March 8 column asking whether I should keep this column’s gold-toothed, mustachioed, sombrero-wearing fat Mexican logo and what should I name him. The overwhelming majority of ustedes support amnesty for the wab, but a few folks also made articulate arguments in favor......

What’s the deal with men in masks in Mexico? From Subcomandante Marcos to El Santo, masked men seem to be a real fetish in Mexico. Am I supposed to be turned on?—EmbarazadaDear Pregnant Wab: You should be turned on by all Mexican men, chula, masked or not. I’m sure you’re......

What’s the deal with stupid upscale Mexican restaurants? Here in South Florida, they’re popping up like corn smut. And pretty soon, the yuppies down here are going to get the idea that it’s a sign of class to have your guacamole made to order at your table by some grinning......

Dear Mexican: As a kid, I grew up with Mexicans who stole things just to steal. As an adult, I see much of the same behavior from adult Mexicans and their children. And I don’t mean just the poor Mexicans. Why is it in their nature for Mexicans to steal?......

Dear Mexican: Why does Arnold Schwarzenegger keep putting his foot in his mouth and talking smack about MEXICANS? To my understanding, his wife, Maria, is of Mexican descent. He’s not only humiliating nuestra raza, but his wife too. Please give the readers and me some input on the Governator. —Deep......

Dear Mexican: Rice grows in rice paddies flooded with water. From what I understand, Mexico is mostly desert. So how on earth (literally) did Mexicans end up making arroz a staple of their diet? —’Nam Vet Who Has Seen Real Rice Paddies Dear Gabacho: Thank the Moors. They introduced arroz......

Dear Mexican: I am a young, 22-year-old gay Chicano, and I love Mexican men. I’m everything a gay Mexican could wish for. I work full time. I don’t do drugs. But all the gay Mexican hombres in Kansas City just want white guys! I think this might be because in......

Dear Mexican: How do Mexicans get such ridiculous nicknames from seemingly normal names? For instance, José becomes Chepe, Eduardo is Lalo, Gabriel becomes Gabi, and Guillermo devolves into Memo. —It’s Marcela, Not Chela I want to know why Mexicans have such incongruous nicknames. Granted, there are some English nicknames that......

Dear Mexican: In November, a trusted employee of mine came out about his status as an illegal immigrant. Our big-box retail conglomerate’s policy clearly spells out the termination of my employment should I fail to report such an offense, but I love the mojado to death. He’s loyal, punctual and......