One of my British friends rolls her eyes in disgust when she hears me pronounce Monty Python Mahntee PYE-THON rather than Mahntee PYE-th'n, which is how eve...
On June 7, 2005, comedian Joe Wilson, a small camcorder and a 32-ounce Mason jar stood together as one, about eight feet from where two famous actors worked the red carpet at a Hollywood movie premiere. At just the right moment, Wilson’s camera captured Wilson’s jar capturing almost 58 cubic......
Many of us, I’m told, still live in buildings created specifically for human housing. And the more fortunate among us, so the story goes, have multiple rooms at our disposal. Some of these, so-called living rooms, contain not only television sets and comfortable chairs and sofas but coffee tables; and......
MILAN JIANQI LADMAN-FRYKMAN is a small, cute, nonfictional child. You should enjoy reading about her, because it’ll remind you of when you were small, cute and nonfictional, before you noticed that our otherwise friendly world was being ruled almost exclusively by fucked-up people who enjoy doing fucked-up things. By the......
ELIZA JANE SCHNEIDER has her own fingerprints, Social Security number, employment history, references, everything. If you could see the photographs I took of her as she led me through the hallowed private libraries of her mentor and landlord, legendary dialectologist Robert Easton, you’d understand just how nonfictional she is. Easton,......
Why must the big studios pick the Four Seasons Beverly Hills for all of their press junkets? Why can’t journalists and movie stars all shoot baskets together at Fairfax High, or fly up to Vancouver and pick wild blackberries? Even with airfare, the studios would save lots of money, and......
She didn’t like to think of the men who paid her as tricks. She preferred the term “love partners,” as Jan and Paul Crouch called folks who dialed in and pledged on the number that crawled under their plush Praise The Lord chairs on the Trinity Broadcasting Network.—Jerry Stahl, “Pure”HECTOR......
THE LIVING ROOM IS UNSTABLE. At times the couch falls through the floor, or worse. But the next day the floor’s hole has healed, and everything’s fine. The choir sings and the clouds part to reveal a balmy afternoon in the city that surrounds the couch. The city, too, is......
Move to Los Angeles. Let your jaw wobble in amazement. Gasp for air. Rub your eyes. Catch your breath. Check your wallet. Curse your fate . . . —Matt Groening, “How to Write a Weekly Music Column,” Los Angeles Reader, 1985 In his 30 Los Angeles years, Matt Groening has never been......
December 26, 2003, was an extremely crappy day in a string of crappy months and years for Cris Kirkwood. He parked his car in the downtown Phoenix post-office parking lot in such a way as to attract another patron’s unfriendly attention. An argument ensued, and security guard Thomas Goodrum was......