It’s sometimes an awkward situation whenever you still have to see your ex after a breakup. Because on one hand, you’ll grow to resent them stronger every time you encounter them. But on the other hand, you’ll sometimes realize that you’re falling for your ex all over again. Depending if you still want to make it work all over again or if you just want to move on, here are things you can do if you’re catching feelings for your ex once again.
5 Things You Can Do if You’re Falling For Your Ex All Over Again
Assess and internalize the reason for your breakup
If you think you’re falling for your ex all over again, don’t irrationally come running back to them and beg them to get back with you! Keep it cool and don’t let your feelings take over your logic and reasoning. Ask yourself first why you two broke up in the first place — and if you’re willing to forget about it and start all over again.
Be ready to forget about the past — and be willing to handle the relationship better
That said, if you’re going to get back with your ex, will you be willing to forget about the past problems you had with them? Will you finally be able to solve the problems you had? These are the things that you should talk about with your ex. But do also make sure that it’s not just you who can answer these questions with a resounding “yes.” And just because the answer to that is indeed a “yes,” you two must also figure out how you’ll be able to overcome those — not having a solution to your past problems (and a plan for the future ones) might result in you breaking up again.
Problems will always plague a relationship or marriage. And your willingness to endure and solve them signifies maturity in a relationship — and of the relationship! If the issues have a rational solution, apply those in the relationship — especially the second time around. Because not only is an on-and-off relationship often viewed as a “toxic” one (but not all the time), but it’s also the kind that needs to be properly looked into — it’s best that you find the root cause of the predicament you’re in!
Do you keep breaking up for the same reason? It might be something you need to properly address. However, if it’s an abusive relationship, most people — and even experts — agree that walking away permanently is the best solution.
Now that you’re willing to get back with your ex (and they want to be in your life again), you’ll have to rebuild your relationship all over from scratch — regardless of who was at fault for the breakup; but this shouldn’t matter anymore! You and your ex will have to relearn how to trust each other, get to know and understand each other better, and both should be willing to handle the relationship better.
Did you live in the same place as your ex? Ask yourself if you want to go back to sharing one space with them again. If the proximity easily irks you, then it might be better if you live separately for now — until you’re willing to accept their annoying habits (or if they’re willing to change that).
It may take a while before you get used to having your ex back in your life again, but patience is your best friend here. Because if your emotions get too intense and you want things to go back to your “normal” relationship too soon, it might get the best of you! — this might start new and old fights. Remind yourself to be grateful that you have your ex with you again the second time around. Moreover, patience should be a mutual trait between you and your ex — don’t have them rush your newly-rebuilt relationship.
“It’s ok to ask for help” — almost everyone can agree with this commonly said phrase. And it also goes for relationships! Just because the marriage or relationship typically only involves two people, that doesn’t mean it should just be you and your partner having a say in how conflicts should be resolved — and where and how your relationship should go.
There are lots of relationship experts that can help you if you consider going to couples therapy. There, they can advise you how to properly go about your day-to-day lives with your ex (or soon-to-be partner again); therapists can view your relationship from an outside perspective — minus the emotions that couples would normally come with whenever they argue or fight. Most of the time, therapists are — and should be — unbiased with their opinions.
We’re talking about the reality that there’s the possibility that your relationship may or may not work the second time around. Relationships and marriages aren’t perfect — and it can either work or not. Be prepared for the possibility of losing them again. But when you do end your relationship for good, you must find ways to easily handle moving on in healthy ways.
Falling For Your Ex Again? Don’t Panic, Don’t Be Overly Dramatic — It Can Be Romantic!
If you find yourself falling for your ex again and you’re unsure what to do with all the feelings that are building up, try to stay calm, assess the breakup and possible rekindling of the relationship, and as much as possible, ask for help from people who can help you deal with the relationship you had — and might end up having again.
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