Not all relationships work out. Sometimes, even if we thought we found “the one” for us, we don’t end up with them — and it’s painful to internalize and accept this fact. However, nobody should unhealthily dwell on what should already be considered the “past.” It may be difficult to get over a breakup but it’s very possible.

Here’s how.

Your Guide to Getting Over a Breakup:

Take time to heal

You’re allowed to feel pain but you shouldn’t blame yourself for the relationship that didn’t work out. If the breakup was fairly recent, know that it’s normal to feel as though you didn’t do enough to salvage the relationship — but it’s not healthy to think about this and only this.

What you should do, though, is focus on the positive things about you and your surroundings. Tell yourself that you will feel good enough once again — for someone else and/or (especially) for yourself; you don’t always have to end up with someone to feel adequate!

Consider what to do with their contact info

You will find various pieces of advice from people and the internet if you should delete them on social media and their number or if you should keep them. (Some say deleting their contact info is petty while others say it’s the only way you’ll start moving on.)

At the end of the day, the decision is still up to you. If you delete your ex, however, make sure that it’s not an impulsive decision. On the other hand, consider also if you’re keeping their contact info because you still hope that they’ll talk to you again — or because you plan on doing it yourself.

Reinvent yourself

We’ve seen and heard of the cliche where one cuts or dyes their hair after a breakup but perhaps there’s a healthy reason for that — it’s time to make changes. Because on the bright side, you have more freedom now. Leaving your old lewk in the past can symbolize a new beginning. As long as you’ll do it to improve your appearance, there’s no harm in doing that.

It doesn’t have to just be your hair that you can change — opt for a new style, give your house a different theme, or listen to different genres. Your new world is your oyster!

Be around supportive people

You don’t have to be sulking alone! You deserve a shoulder to cry on. Talk to your friends or family about it. Go out with them. Have coffee dates with your loved ones or go partying. After all, you now have more time to be with them.

It’s important (if you’ll party or drink when getting over a breakup) that you don’t turn to alcohol in an unhealthy way — don’t drown yourself in sorrow. A bottle or blunt should make you feel better. Remember, distraction — not destruction.

Be patient

If there’s one phrase that’s difficult to fathom while you’re trying to get over a breakup is that “time heals.” But it’s true! People heal in different timelines. Some recover quicker than others. Don’t compare yourself to your ex — especially if they moved on sooner than you. Focus on yourself and your healing process. Don’t date other people out of spite for your ex or to make them feel jealous — you’re only harming yourself and the ones involved if you do that!

Oh Well, C’est La Vie

It’s difficult to get over a breakup. But to do just that is the most valuable thing you can do for yourself. There’s no blueprint for how one recovers exactly, because everyone is different — and so is every relationship and the reasons for it to end. Take time to recover and don’t resort to unhealthy ways or habits.

Breakups are normal and you’ll never know who you’ll end up with. Hey, you never know! You might end up with someone better — or, if not, you’ll learn to love yourself better! Because being single is sexy, too.


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