We didn't think being an L.A. Lakers fan could get any more embarrassing than that moment last month in which Kobe Bryant threw his sweatrag on the floor and called the ref a “fucking faggot.”

Nowhere to go but up, right?

Wrong. In the most miserable Lakers game this season — and that's saying something — Andrew Bynum decided to one-up his team's potty-mouthed superstar Sunday night with a horrific mid-air elbow jab that landed harder than anything Manny Pacquiao managed to plow into Shane Mosley the night before. And, well, that's saying something.

Brace yourself. The slo-mo recap begins at 0:43:

Ladies and gentlemen — Andrew Bynum, FTL.

The worst part is that, despite Bynum's armpit mauling, Dallas Mavericks shooter J.J. Barea actually makes the shot, then dusts himself off and strolls away like a total champ. Oh wait, it just got worse: Bynum then strips down to his basketball shorts for a testosterone-reeking walk of shame to the locker room. And, uh, they lose 86-122.

We're starting to think the Mavericks were right: “Mamas, don't let your children grow up to be Lakers fans.”

Even the smoothest sportscasters had a hard time expressing the sheer humiliation in the air, felt by all who associate themselves with this once-triumphant team; we find ourselves at a loss for words this gloomy Monday morning-after as well.

It appears no dosage of Phil Jackson's zen and magical Power Balance forces could give the Lakers the mojo they needed to bow out with grace, much less come out ahead in 2011. One thing's for sure: Lamar's in for a major spanking tonight.


LA Weekly