This is beyond hilarious. From Eater, a post imagining an alternate universe in which Anthony Bourdain goes on Dancing With The Stars, which apparently premiered (again) last night. “During the show Anthony Bourdain's wife tweeted that a few years ago he was asked join the show (both Rocco DiSpirito and Mark Dacascos, aka the Iron Chef Chairman, have competed in the past). 'Thankfully he declined,' she wrote.” How about partnering up Bourdain with Ruth Reichl? @RuthBourdain, with music.

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