I know you're gay, but what am I?
Oh right, I'm a woman…ovulating.
Let's give it up for gaydar science and a study that uncovered this little nook of nature. The closer a woman gets to peak ovulation, the more intuitively she'll know whether the guy she's eyeing is gay, straight or gay for pay.
OK, not really gay for pay. But what I'm saying is that all she has to do is look at his face to figure out which team he plays for.
So I ask, doesn't it make sense that ovulating heterosexual women are looking for guys who like vagina? They're looking for baby daddies, not shopping buddies. Besides, how does one come up with a survey like this? Is it over a game of beer pong? Or while skimming the pages of HotorNot.com?
Here's how: Using the power of the female gaze – not gays, these were 40 heterosexual women – subjects were asked to look at photos of 80 men. All of the men (40 gay, 40 straight) displayed similar facial expressions.
Left to their own devices, women struggled to decide, gay or not so gay, but their guesses were more accurate than not.
The team of researchers, both from the University of Toronto and Tufts University, then performed a similar study with a second group of ovulating heterosexuals. Only they substituted the 80 photos of men with 100 photos of 100 women.
Using the same oracle-like powers of ovulation, they asked again, can you tell which women are lesbians and which are not? Answer: Heterosexual women can't.
It boils down to this: The closer an ovulating heterosexual woman is to peak ovulation, the more heightened her sensitivity is to who a man wants to bone. And apparently women who read romance novels are also more in tune with figuring out if he would rather do, Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt.
“Men's sexual orientation is relevant to conception and thus of greater importance as women are nearer to ovulation.”
Sure, makes sense.
This isn't the first ovulation study published in “Psychological Science,” the publication that first reported this finding. Not only do ovulating women give good gaydar, they're also less likely to call dad around ovulation.
After all, who wants an incestual accident?
This kind of reminds me of that scene in “Super High Me.” The one where Doug Benson tests his psychic powers sober and then high on weed. He discovers he's more psychic when he's high.
It may be a bad connection, but the end result is the same. Stoned or ovulating, survey says you're more likely to have better instincts.