Ah, the Rose Parade. That fresh, floral, ferociously American march of Girl Scouts and City Councilmembers and high-school tuba nerds — who, every New Year's, make Pasadena's main drag into a 1950s-era celebration of tissue-paper patriotism, and the center of the televised nation.

What better locale, then, for the indefatigable Occupy Wall Street movement to remind the masses, over three months into the “We are the 99 percent” protests…

… that they're far from satisfied? (Assuming, safely, that Obama doesn't up-end the corporately funded political system by then.) Especially since OWS has already hinted it'll be heading west to Occupy L.A. headquarters for the winter months.

But these rebels aren't above a little traditional fanfare. From OccupyTheRoseParade.org:

“In addition to street occupation and other strategies, we will be building a 'OccupyWallStreet' Human Float. Also: Bands, banner drops, dancers, clowns, old cars, impromptu marching bands — 'This is What Democracy Looks Like', Flag gals/men, etc.”

Organizers have set a turnout goal of 40,000.

We're guessing the human float hasn't obtained an official permit, mostly because that would kind of defeat the point. A Rose Parade spokeswoman tells us the event's executive director won't be able to get back to us until tomorrow; however, she says the OWS plan is “not a surprise” to parade organizers.

“It's definitely in the news,” she adds. (The Canada Free Press included, oddly enough.)

The only part of Occupy the Rose Parade that would really run into trouble would be the float, from 8 a.m. to 11 a.m. on January 2. As noted by the protest's website, “curbside camping on the parade route is allowed beginning at noon the day before the parade,” albeit sans tents. Totally in their element and everything!

We've got to say, the whole Occupy [Insert Proper Noun Here] joke has gotten pretty old — accelerated by Halloween-costume overkill, a la “Occupy My Panties” — but there's something about “Occupy the Rose Parade” that's still so hilarious. Just the thought of those grizzled, outdoorsy revolutionaries, all up in the Queen of the Tournament's pretty-princess grill (this was supposed to be MY day!), might be enough to rouse us from hangover and turn on the telly.

Even more hilarious is Occupy the Rose Parade's PR-worthy pitch for their stakeout of choice:

“Those lucky enough to get Grandstand tickets or a spot along the Rose Parade route are treated to a two-hour Parade of magnificent floral floats, talented marching bands, and high-stepping equestrians. The five-and-a-half mile Rose Parade route begins at the corner of Ellis Street and Orange Grove Boulevard in Pasadena. The Parade travels north on Orange Grove at a leisurely 2.5-mile per hour pace and then turns east onto Colorado Boulevard where the majority of the Parade takes place.”

“High-stepping equestrians”? Seriously? What happened to “Everything is not coming up roses”?


Advertising disclosure: We may receive compensation for some of the links in our stories. Thank you for supporting LA Weekly and our advertisers.