It was a tweet heard round the world. Just as we were slipping into a post-Halloween funk (no special treats till Thanksgiving?), Christina Tosi, the mad genius behind the gloriously addictive, trademarked treats at Momofuku Milk Bar, cried out via Twitter “fuck yeah! our new shipping site is live!” And with those words, we out here on the Left Coast, who have for too long been deprived of Tosi's confectionery mash-ups of classic pastry technique and quotidian ingredients, found the world had gotten just a little bit sweeter.
So what to order now that Momofuku Milk Bar is our oyster? Well, it seems that the new online store is limited to cakes and pies, which means neither the bakery's new gorgeous looking black sesame croissants nor its stalwarts, like the chocolate malt cake or the cereal milk flavored soft serve, are available (though Bon Appétit ran the cake recipe in its September issue and Tosi's cereal milk custard for Momofuku Ko is in David Chang's cookbook.)
But for the novice and the Momofuku-starved fan, the site offers plenty of options for a descent into insane sugar-filled revelry. Turn the page for our rigorously researched suggestions for what to order.
1. Crack Pie: The filling, a deceptively simple combination of butter, sugar, milk, cream, and a brazen dash of salt, lies creamy and smooth on a crunchy bed of oat cookie crust. Just one bite and you'll understand the insidious nature of this salty-sweet luscious pie. This is how they get you.
2. Blueberry and Cream Cookie: Moist and chewy in the center with an outer ring of crispy cookie crust and packed with bursts of flavor thanks to Tosi's signature milk crumb streusel, this is the Platonic ideal of a blueberry muffin reinvented as a cookie.
3. Corn Cookie: With the flavor of Iowa in summer, this buttery golden-hued cookie is initially disconcerting in its spot-on corniness. With each subsequent bite, however, you are reminded of corn's inherent sweetness and wonder why you haven't been eating corn cookies for years.
4. Compost Cookie: A cookie crammed with ingredients straight out of the bottom of a messy third grader's lunch box: graham cracker crumbs, potato chips, pretzels, and butterscotch and chocolate chips.
5. Franken Pie: While it may seem a cop-out, the Franken Pie allows the Milk Bar rookie to sample two slices each of the Crack Pie, the compost-like Candy Bar Pie, the accurately named Cinnamon Bun Pie, and the minty cheesecake Grasshopper Pie. Think of it as a pie flight.
One brief word of warning: the goodies are pricey. Pies are $44 each and the site requires the use of overnight shipping, which runs about $58 to L.A. Cookies are more affordable at ten bucks for a tin of six, and can be shipped standard. It's expensive for sure, but still cheaper than a flight to JFK.