The horniest old man in history has never let age be more than a number, and his youthful Twitter account — clocking in at 21 Tweets yesterday — is further testament to the man's utterly ageless, uh, text-erity. (Unless he's got a Playmate on smart-phone duty, too.)

And boy, does 84-year-old Playboy founder Hugh Hefner have something to Tweet about. Looks like he's in love again — this time, with 24-year-old Crystal Harris, or Playmate of the Month for December 2009.

So last year, right? And whatever happened to that Holly chick?

The saga began on the night before Christmas. After sending “Merry Xmas” Tweets to a certain Heather, Niki, Suzanne, Sabrina, Jaime and Ariana — then detailing Christmas dinner and movie night — @hughhefner dropped the bomb:

After the movie tonight, Crystal & I exchanged gifts. I gave Crystal a ring. A truly memorable Christmas Eve.

Oh god. Not again. A much younger, Viagra-free Hefner married Mildred Williams in 1949, divorced 10 years later, then married Playmate Kimberly Conrad in 2009 1989. We're not even going to begin with the girlfriends.

Anyway, Hef's Twitter account became a flurry of cheese from then on out: stuff like “I got what I was hoping for for Christmas, Laura–Crystal's love” and “My wish for the New Year is to remain as happy as I am right now.”

Harris kindly confirmed that yes, the happy couple was sitting in a mansion the size of a third-world country looking down at their respective Tweet-mobiles:

@hughhefner & I are hanging out on our iPads lol

OK, we're over this. You can take over from here, fake Michael Cera:

Age is just a number, @hughhefner and @crystalharris deserve to be happy.

LA Weekly