You can jet-set around the globe, hopping from country to country and you will never, ever encounter what can only be found in the United States of America: Free Comic Book Day.

“Oh,” I know some of you are thinking, “aren't free comic books one of the lures Catholic Priests used to tantalize their victims?” Yes!

“Oh,” I know some of you are assuming, “free comic books? There must be something wrong with them! Old, slightly tattered, covered with some boogers or a bit of dried dog piss.” Well, no, no, no, and no! These are new comic books, in pristine condition.

“But what's the catch ? You have to buy something in these stores before you can get a free comic book, right ?” Wrong!! There are no strings attached. You can flit in and out, free as a bird, taking with you some free comic books as you skip merrily along!

“But how do these stores make any money from giving away comic books?” They don't! Ha ha! That's the beauty of it! Free Comic Book Day exists merely as a testament to the greatness of our country, like Mount Rushmore or the Hoover Dam.

Participating comic book stores: Golden Apple, 7018 Melrose Ave., Hlywd., (323) 658-6047; Meltdown, 7522 Sunset Blvd., Hlywd., (323) 851-7263; Secret Headquarters, 3817 W. Sunset Blvd., Silverlake, (323) 666-2228; Hi De Ho, 525 Santa Monica Blvd., Santa Monica; Sat., May 1. (310) 394-2620.

Sat., May 1, 2010

LA Weekly