Jeff Weiss

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Neurologist Conclusively Proves Snoop Dogg Has Smoked Himself "Retarded"

After an intense scrutiny of the video for "Sensual Seduction" confirmed what a battery of MRI exams had already hinted at, neurologist Gerald Schwartz of The Mayo Clinic has decisively concluded that the rapper, Snoop Dogg, has smoked himself "retarded." "Retarded isn't a term we even use anymore, but in......
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Bishop Lamont-The Next Great West Coast Hope?

I...listened to all that Death Row stuff....and Lords Of The Underground, Busta Rhymes, Redman and Keith Murray, where your takes had to be so clean and ill to get off the phonetics that you were dropping. Your lines had to be crisp. Other cats don’t come from that school. It......
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Burial's Untrue is a Moody Masterpiece

About three weeks ago when I was in New York, Tal Rosenberg pretty much gushed non-stop about the Burial record's brilliance. At the time, I didn't even know that the London-based Dub Step producer had a new album coming out, which isn't much of a surprise considering fewer than ten......
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Raiders of the Lost Art

Sometime after 50 arrived, the art of the narrative wandered into a blizzard of coke raps, artificial hood mythologizing and pandering simplicity. Complexity no longer moved units, and with sales sliding, Scarface xeroxes and ringtone rappers became the safe bets. You can't blame the suits either. They're just trying to......
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Tell 'Em Why You Mad: The Guide to Hipster Haberdashery

If home is where you hang your hat then Silver Lake is rapidly turning into the world's largest hat rack. Over the past 12 months, it has become de rigueur in hipster courting rituals for male hipsters (homo habilus hipstericus) to trot out increasingly ridiculous pieces of vintage head-ware in......

Soulja Boy: Cranking the Chain

Carl Carlson: I don’t get all this eyeball stuff. Uh, what are they supposed to represent? Uh, eyeballs? Moe Syslak: It’s pomo! Moe: Postmodern! Moe: Yea...

will.i.am Solves Your Girl Trouble

Late last month, will.i.am, the capitalization-eschewing mastermind behind the Black Eyed Peas, released his debut solo album, Songs About Girls. Made to show t...
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Oh Hells Yes

Four years ago, the initial Fuck Yeah Fest drew 2,000 people, lured in by the impressive slate of local bands and the concept of literally going to a free Fuck (Yeah) fest. By year two, promoter Sean Carlson was getting harassed by locals complaining about the “Fuck Yeah” signs papering......