The Silver Lake Jubilee is back again in its full glory, with an impressive roster of bands, comedians, artists and writers performing to benefit a variety of local causes. Think it's just for hipsters? Think again.

1. Proceeds benefit the Los Angeles Arts and Athletics Alliance. Hipsters hate sports.

2. The Silver Lake Jubilee is a single-use-bottled-water-free event. Bring your own vessel and pour your own water for free! Hipsters love to take on many of the external trappings of poverty, even though they overwhelmingly benefit from structural privilege, and thus generally frequent festivals that are held in the sweltering heat and charge $4 or more for water.

3. The Silver Lake Jubilee will be a life-changing event (according to the event website). Everyone, not just hipsters, wants to be able to say they were there when.

4. There will be children's books readings. As in, books that are actually suitable for children, rather than books for adults presented in cartoon format for ironic purposes. Hipsters do not like children.

5. There will be tons of food trucks and local vendors selling all manner of local confections and delights. There will also be a beer garden. Not to state the obvious, but hipsters eat sparingly, if at all, and drink only PBR.

Silver Lake Jubilee is Sat. and Sun., May 21-22, under the bridge at Sunset and Santa Monica boulevards.

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