It’s November! Which means that we’ve almost survived this year and I think that calls for a little celebration. How should we celebrate? Probably with lots of liquor. It’s been a tough one, but also TV!
Nov. 2: Young Sheldon, CBS
And on the seventh day, God planted the idea for Young Sheldon in Adam’s head, because God is cruel and wanted to draw out our human suffering. It was passed down, generation to generation, like a recessive gene, just sitting there dormant, waiting for the right time in the right host body. It was only upon oozing into Chuck Lorre’s form that it could finally take hold, and God’s ultimate vengeance could rain down on us, the scum he created, and his biggest mistake. Anyway, enjoy!
Nov. 3: Alias Grace, Netflix
Hulu got The Handmaid's Tale, so you know Netflix had to cream all over Margaret Atwood’s Alias Grace. I love some healthy competition over feminist literature! Inspired by the true story of a grisly double murder in a small Canadian village in the 1800s, the six-episode miniseries is written by Sarah Polley (yay!) and stars Sarah Gadon, Anna Paquin, Kerr Logan, Zachary Levi and David freaking Cronenberg. It’s basically all your creepy historical fiction wet dreams combined into one tight lil’ package, and my body is ready.
Nov. 5: SMILF, Showtime
Mr. Robot’s Frankie Shaw writes, produces, directs and stars in this semi-autobiographical comedy series about being a young single mom. I love single moms, and this also has Connie Britton in a recurring role, so it’s already a winner in my books. Call Hollywood and tell them I’ve greenlit this for another 15 seasons and to send over some cocaine and LaCroix while they’re at it.
Nov. 14: Future Man, Hulu
This looks dumb and probably good. From Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg, this sci-fi comedy stars The Hunger Games’ Josh Hutcherson as a janitor who must travel through time to save humanity. It doesn’t sound too dissimilar from Adam Pally’s Making History, so for anyone keeping track the score is: Two shows about time-traveling idiot white men, zero shows about vaginas. Get with the ’90s, Hollywood! Fewer white men flying through space and more stuff made for and about vaginas! CHOP CHOP.
Nov. 19: Search Party, TBS
Finally! It’s back and TBS can stop replaying the ads for the first season, blessed be. Last year, Search Party dealt with solving a mystery via the lens of stereotypical Brooklynite 20-somethings, and now that it’s resolved, the second season promises a sexy noir-influenced romp that has our protagonists looking over their shoulders and stabbing backs. Can’t wait.
Nov. 21: Runaways, Hulu
More mickey fickey Marvel! Damn them. They’re like Augustus Gloop at the chocolate river, greedily slurping up all of that delicious TV development money before the rest of us get any. A part of me wants them to fall in and flail, and another part of me wants them to keep it coming, because I LOVE CAPTAIN AMERICA. Anyway, this teen show from Gossip Girl creators Josh Schwartz and Stephanie Savage focuses on the teenage children of Marvel villains. Their parents might be bad but these kids want to do good, and yada yada yada. It’ll probably be mad fun, and has the potential to be the next Riverdale. That, or it’ll drown in a chocolate fountain. I’m cool either way.
Nov. 23: She's Gotta Have It, Netflix
Spike Lee's TV debut is an updated remake of his 1986 masterpiece, She's Gotta Have It. I have a love-hate thing with Spike Lee, not that he knows or gives a shit, but I do love this movie, and the thought of setting it in present-day Brooklyn is very enticing. Those suitors better be mighty fine, and he better not play any of them!
Nov. 29: The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, Amazon
Fuck me, I’m gonna love this so hard. Queen of the Fast-Talking Female Lead, Amy Sherman-Palladino (Gilmore Girls, Bunheads), takes her rapid-fire dialogue to 1958 NYC where a young Jewish housewife (Rachel Brosnahan, who is pitch-perfect in the pilot) has her entire life upended and winds up as a stand-up comedian. It’s kinda like Phyllis Diller’s story, right? Diller was an army wife who one day was all, “Fuck it, I’m hella funny and now I’m gonna be famous.” And she was, and she did, and I’ll tell you one other thing. Fresh out of college, I was watching her E! True Hollywood Story, and Diller was talking about what she called her lowest point, when she was an army wife living in a hellish base in Alameda. They flashed on a picture of her house, and no shit, you guys, it was the house I was currently living in! I was also at a particular low point in my life with seven foster dogs and no hopes of employment, so I can relate. Anyway, I did not go on to become a famous stand-up, but I am still alive, and I consider that a win for all of us. The point is: Women are hella resilient, and this show looks great.