[Editor's note: Why This Song Sucks determines why particular tracks blow using science. It appears on West Coast Sound every Wednesday.]

Song: Dev's “In The Dark”

History: “In The Dark” is the is the second single from The Night The Sun Came Up. That's the debut album from electro-pop enthusiast Dev, who very well might be the world's best, most convincing Ke$ha impersonator. This is a terrible, egregious thing to be.

Atmospherics: Predictable electro-something or other; sounds like what it feels like when a person tries very hard to be sexy; digitized libidos; can definitely snake its way into your hypothalamus if you're not careful.

Scientific Analysis: There are several reasons why this song is less than stellar, but its primary downfall is ambiguity.

The term “dancing in the dark” appears to be a metaphor for engaging in intercourse; that seems clear enough. The rest of the song though is a tad more confusing. A sample from the first proper verse:

Can you work on me? Open my body up and do some surgery/

Now that you've got me up, I want to taste it, taste it/

And see those pockets aces/

Wanna see who you are/

Got a sex drive that's push to start

Again, I suspect that these are allusions to sex. The last line seems to imply that, should you require sex immediately, she is THAT DUDE. The rest, however, are murky. And that is frustrating.

The first line seems to imply that the verse is about a doctor's appointment, but that doesn't hold up.

The context of a poker game doesn't quite work either.

A first date, maybe?

So it's probably sex, then. But, wait, there's also this:


(I) Ke$ha is less interesting than a tree stump.

(II) We know Dev can have sex as quickly as Toyota Prius can start, but that's about it.

(III) They should probably just go ahead and retire the Guy Holding Woman Musician's Breasts shot.

LA Weekly