Misanthropic masses, commence with the head-scratching. It's rumored that Mark Wahlberg has been offered the role of Eric Draven in a remake of The Crow, which may have been written by Nick Cave. Scoff, scoff.
(Sorry, we're a bit under the weather.)
Despite being a Goth cult classic, the original 1994 film is probably best known for the on-set death of Brandon Lee, the last known Draven.
The star was accidentally shot and killed during filming when the props department left a real bullet in the .44 caliber revolver that another actor was supposed to fire at him.
Even excepting the awful circumstances of Lee's death, the idea of a remake is touchy, to say the least. Eric Draven is a sacred figure to many.
The angst, the tragedy, the violence, the total badassery of his good guy-ness … Is it any wonder that every year around Halloween, in every neighborhood, his visage gets painted across the faces of a handful of teens and nostalgic young adults?
So this raises some interesting (if not disturbing) questions:
1) If Wahlberg is Eric, will Katharine Heigl play Sarah?
2) Is Wahlberg out of New York cop roles?
3) Will they recreate the scene that caused Lee's death?
4) Will the new soundtrack be all rapegaze?
5) And if you were in charge, who would you cast as Eric Draven?
Let us know in the comments section.