The LAPD is putting on a Super Bowl blitz this weekend, and if you think you're going to find a hole and complete a pass like Ben Roethlisberger, good luck with that.

The po-pos have two DUI checkpoints specifically to weed out football drunktards … and they're planning a drunk-driver saturation patrol in the Valley on Super Bowl Sunday.

The good news? Like John Madden, we're putting the cops' strategy in ink doodles you can understand:

Huddle up, party people.

Checkpoint numero uno happens tonight from 8 p.m. to 2 a.m. on Hollywood Boulevard at Gower Street in Hollywood (map).

Checkpoint numero dos happens Saturday from 8 p.m. to 2 a.m. at Ventura Boulevard and Tyrone Avenue in Sherman Oaks (map).

The Super Bowl Sunday “saturation patrol” happens Sunday from 3 p.m. to 11 p.m. in the North Hollywood and Van Nuys areas (cops will be patrolling and could be anywhere).

Don't be a loser.

Advertising disclosure: We may receive compensation for some of the links in our stories. Thank you for supporting LA Weekly and our advertisers.

LA Weekly