FRIDAY, August 31

In January 1970, it was good to be Jimmy Page, Robert Plant, John Bonham and John Paul Jones, more famously known as Led Zeppelin. They had just released their second album, which we all know by heart and understand that it was impossible to play side one and not play side two. (Kids, ask your parents what the hell — no swearing! — I’m talking about.) BBC TV director Stanley Dorfman was enlisted by the group to film their Royal Albert Hall performance, and the resulting film, Led Zeppelin Live at the Royal Albert Hall, has screened in L.A. only once before, at the Mods & Rockers Festival. Not only did American Cinematheque get its cinematheque-hands on a copy, Dorfman himself will be on hand to answer questions after the screening. Also screening is Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders From Mars. Aero Theater, 1328 Montana Ave., Santa Monica; Fri., Aug. 31, 7:30 p.m.; $9. (323) 466-FILM.

SATURDAY, September 1

The Long Beach Blues Festival always presents a huge dilemma: Which day to go? This year on Saturday, you get Buddy Guy, Dr. John, Taj Mahal & the Phantom Blues Band and Koko Taylor & Her Blues Machine. That’s an extremely solid lineup of many hours of blues. On Sunday, it’s Irma Thomas and the Professionals, Robert Cray Band, Jimmy Reed Highway, and — lordy, lordy! — Little Richard. I say go Sunday. No, wait — Saturday is a no-brainer. Ah, hell, just get a hotel in Long Beach for the weekend. Cal State University, 1288 N. Bellflower Blvd., Long Beach; Sat.-Sun., Sept. 1-2, 9 a.m.-6 p.m.; $45. (213) 480-3232.

SUNDAY, September 2

Cubensis has been doing the Grateful Dead for 20 years — so long, in fact, that if you put all their jams together, they would reach from Little Star to Dark Star. “The Grateful Dead lasted 35 years because they always found something new to do at every show. We do a different show every time and play spontaneously and give our audience something that’s not packaged,” explains the group’s remarkably well-spoken front man, Craig Marshall. In case you’re wondering, cubensis is the scientific name for magic mushroom. 14 Below, 1348 14th St., Santa Monica; every Sun., 7:30 p.m.; $7. (310) 451-5040.

MONDAY, September 3

It’s a big day for the Venice Bodybuilding Hall of Fame: Jack La Lanne gets inducted and receives a lifetime-achievement award. La Lanne, of course, is the überfit former host of TV’s first show dedicated to exercise. At 92, he still works out every day. Also, it’s the grand opening of the Walk of Fame of Muscle Beach, with bronze plaques honoring such stretch-marked stars as John Balik, Dave Draper, Cory Everson, Joe Gold, Joe Weider, Frank Zane and Rachel McLish. A bodybuilding contest completes the salute to muscles. Venice Beach Recreation Center, 1800 Ocean Front Walk, Venice; Mon., Sept. 3, finals at 1 p.m. (310) 399-2775.

TUESDAY, September 4

Los Angeles Philharmonic music director Esa-Pekka Salonen returns to the Hollywood Bowl for his first appearance in two years, conducting his own work for orchestra, Foreign Bodies, with original choreography performed by modern dancers from Diavolo, in a show called Diavolo Dances Salonen. They throw some Mahler in there too. Hollywood Bowl, 2301 N. Highland Ave., Hlywd.; Tues., Sept. 4, 8 p.m.; $6-$43. (213) 850-2000.

WEDNESDAY, September 5

I can’t really recommend the following, but I would be remiss not to tell you about “Golden Girls Gone Wild,” which, as the name suggests, features artwork of Bea Arthur, Rue McClanahan, Betty White and that other one in nasty poses. Nasty, nasty poses. What’s next? “Behind the Green Acres Door”? World of Wonder, 6650 Hollywood Blvd., Hlywd.; thru Sept. 7. Call for very confusing hours: (323) 603-6300.

THURSDAY, September 6

Wake up, Maggie, I think I’ve got something to say to you/It’s early September and you really should be back onstage/But I didn’t mean in clothes like that/Oh, Mags, I loved you when you were fat/Oh, Maggie, I just can’t laugh anymore-ore-ore/Now you’re doing the dance of the belly/But it’s not jam and not even jelly/Oh, Maggie . . . sumpthin’ sumpthin’ about how I laughed at all your jokes. Songwriting is too hard. Go see Margaret Cho’s The Sensuous Woman, a variety show with stripping and burlesque. The Renberg Theater, Gay & Lesbian Theater, 1125 McCadden Pl., Hlywd.; Thurs.-Sat., Aug. 30-Sept. 15, 8 p.m.; $25. (323) 860-7300.

According to last week’s Associated Press poll, one in four people didn’t read any books last year. As unbelievable as that statistic is, you know that right now there are New Yorky dickheads pointing the finger right here. A new book club launches this week called L.A. Reads. Brought to us by Kim Cooper and Richard Schave, who run the Esotouric bus tour of such sights as Raymond Chandler’s L.A., the series kicks off with a discussion of Mildred Pierce author James M. Cain, along with “delicious pie just like Mildred used to make.” Future meetings include discussions of Reyner Banham and Nathanael West. Philippe the Original, 1001 N. Alameda St., dwntwn.; Thurs., 8 p.m.; free, but buy some pie. (332) 223-2767.

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