I suppose it's inevitable that, as we grow older and our number of daily responsibilities increase despite our efforts otherwise, the random booty call can become more a burden than a pleasant surprise.

When that telltale “ding ding!” from a text message sounds, I instantly attempt a guess at who's interrupting me:

  • mom, who's just learning how to use her cellphone
  • work, with a problem I don't want to hear about
  • the bank, reminding me I have no money
  • dad, also just learning how to use his cellphone

But when the beep sounds and I find a message from Dude #1, #2 or #5 looking to meet up in an hour, horny turns to stress.

How do I find time for this? I have three deadlines, a full laundry hamper, an empty fridge and I haven't seen my cat in days.

Alas, so it seems the days of the spontaneous sex session are over, as I officially scheduled my last booty call to fall between deadline #3 and a dinner meeting planned two hours later.

I told him to get here by 5. He arrived 5 minutes early. Good boy.

The silver lining behind scheduling said booty call is I also scheduled a deadline for him to get out of my house — just in time for a quick shower and costume change.

I had the sheets changed and my stilettos on by 6:04 p.m., AND I managed to have one of the year's best orgasms just 20 minutes earlier.

This could work for me.

originally published at Ojoy.com.

Image courtesy of Graeme Weatherston.  

LA Weekly