11/11/11 is finally here. Happy Nigel Tufnel Day!
After all, the man is both a rock god and a numerologistical prophet. Which is why, in his name, we celebrate this sacred and mystical occasion, when all of the elevens come together.
There's only one problem, however. Nigel Tufnel Day is kind of like Festivus; it's a young holiday, and it's not entirely clear how we're supposed to celebrate it.
For that reason, then, we've compiled a list of 11 scared rituals. Worshiping in this manner will help you keep Nigel Tufnel day holy. (You may want to write these down; November 11, 2111 will be here sooner than you think.)
1. Begin preparations for the world's end
According to the Mayan calendar apocalypse will occur at December 21, 2012, at 11:11 a.m. He just was like a flash of green light. And that was it. Nothing was left.
2. Study up
We suggest Anton LaVey's “Eleven Satanic Rules of the Earth.” And, uh, it was tragic, really. He exploded on stage.
3. Watch Ocean's Eleven
The Sammy Davis Jr. version, preferably. What's wrong with bein' sexy?
4. Send a “special new friend” a dozen roses
Keep one for yourself. This miniture bread, I've been working with this now for about half an hour.
5. Listen to “Eleven”
Consider finding work as a salesman, or a haberdasher. What are the hours?
6. Party at Eleven
It's a “glossy gay hot spot for WeHo's fiercest crowds.” D minor, which is the saddest of all keys, I find.
7. Watch a Dr. Who marathon
There have been eleven Dr.s, after all. It's my gum. I might need it later.
8. Shop at 7-Eleven
Authorities said, “Best leave it, unsolved.”
9. Bench an 11-year-old for scoring too many touchdowns.
The sustain, listen to it.
10. Take a refresher course on the eleven times tables
You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?
11. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?
Eleven. Exactly. One louder.