Updated at the bottom: The car has been recovered. The suspects, not so much.

If you're these burglars, you're either Bourne Supremacy-level ninjas, or you're dumb as hell.

Because, according to the LAPD, you just broke into the home of one of the most recognizable pop stars on the planet and drove off with a relatively rare Italian car.

No one will ever find you in a stolen, white Maserati Quattroporte sedan:
The Los Angeles Police Department says the break-in and burglary happened somewhere in its North Hollywood Division area about 4 p.m. Friday.

(This is another example where the idea that the LAPD dishes out equal treatment to all falls apart: If you, a regular Angeleno, were the victim of a newsworthy crime, the department would give out the block where it happened, as it is generally required by law to do. It's called public information. In this case, stardom trumps Democracy).

Cyrus has lived in both Studio City and Toluca Lake, which are patrolled by the North Hollywood Division.

Credit: A $140,000 Quattroporte GTS via maserati.com

Credit: A $140,000 Quattroporte GTS via maserati.com

According to an LAPD statement:

A male and female scaled a fence to gain access to the property.

The suspects were able to gain access into the residence and garage. They removed property including jewelry and a 2014 white, 4-door, Maserati Quattroporte. No one was home at the time of the burglary.

It appears Cyrus is on tour in Europe. She was scheduled to perform at the Ericsson Globe Arena in Stockholm on May 30.

The LAPD says its North Hollywood burglary detectives are on the case. Anyone with info was asked to call 818-623-4045.

[Update at 4:30 p.m.]: The LAPD this afternoon said the Maserati has been recovered in Simi Valley but that “no suspects are in custody at this time.”

Maybe they're not as dumb as we think. At least they ditched the rare, white ride.

Send feedback and tips to the author. Follow Dennis Romero on Twitter at @dennisjromero. Follow LA Weekly News on Twitter at @laweeklynews.

Advertising disclosure: We may receive compensation for some of the links in our stories. Thank you for supporting LA Weekly and our advertisers.