That insane pint-sized latina porn star Lupe Fuentes is going back on The Howard Stern Show Sept. 23 so she can get some attention, yell and giggle and then scream and moan while “getting the poison out” on The Sybian.

What's the Sybian, you ask? Who the fuck is Lupe Fuentes and how on earth is she over 18? Good questions.

I'll tackle question A first: The Sybian is one of the most popular and well-known sex machines (I prefer to call it an orgasm wrangler) that looks like a cross between a horse saddle and…well…a black lump.

It was made in 1987 and remains one of the only sex tools out there that can guarantee an orgasm out of even the most prude, anorgasmic or nervous lady. (The other being the Eroscillator …I'll discuss that piece of genius another time.)

The rider straddles the saddle and places her main pleasure zone (ick, stupid euphemism…I meant to say clitoris) on the attachment of her (or his, if this is a forced orgasm situation) choice. Then the attached dial determines how hard and soft it all goes down. It's pretty fucking hot.

OK and so onto question B: Lupe Fuentes is a teeny tiny chick who's one of Wicked Pictures' newest contract starlets and making a splash with her…enthusiasm. Yeah, let's call it that. If you've tuned into Stern in the past and heard what sounds like a little kid talking about butt fucking, well it was probably Lupe.

She's promising “one of the greatest shows anyone who has ever listened to Howard Stern.”

[EDITOR'S NOTE: *cough*cough*]

So tune in, I guess.

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