How do I take the reigns in the sack without becoming some kinky dominatrix? 

There are a million ways to take control without wearing leather and whips. You can do something as simple as initiating sex or grasping your partners wrists and guiding him or her into what you want next to something as kinky as pulling out ropes and a hitachi wand to force an orgasm. A lot of people love when their partners get verbal about what they want, and that may be just enough to make you feel like you've taken control.

Image: djcodrin.

LA Weekly