Los Angeles might have a housing crisis in which it takes an upper-middle-class income just to be able to afford a decent family apartment, but Dwell magazine thinks we're uber-cool.

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The publication has named us “America's Most Successfully Reinvented Metropolis,” and will celebrate this morning by handing out its first annual “Re-inventor Awards” at the Met Lofts downtown.

Honorees will include L.A.'s gentrifier-in-chief, Central City Association honcho Carol Schatz:
The association employs those security “shirts” downtown that regulate the homeless and help LAPD keep the Occupy movement in check.

(As long as downtown is safe for modern design, we're good.)

See also: L.A.'s 10 Creepiest People

Dwell clearly seeks to reward remodeling, redesign and the removal of the unwashed masses, which is exactly what's been happening downtown. The publication calls the Met Lofts an example of “the new golden age of urban lifestyle.”

It's the Golden Age if you have cash. If not, you're living in the dark ages, under a bridge. We hear the concrete is delightfully minimal this time of year, though. And you can enjoy the street art totally al fresco. So there's that.

The publication suggests that this annual shindig will forever more celebrate “the rebirth of Downtown Los Angeles and the top contributors behind this remarkable transformation.”

This year's event happens at 10:30 a.m. today at 1050 S. Flower St. This weekend Dwell will host Dwell on Design at the L.A. Convention Center, too.

There's no turning back, my homeless. Might as well grab your tents and head for the river.

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