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. . . the Christmas lights on Hollywood Boulevard don’t go all the way to Vine Street this year?


. . . guitar solos are making a comeback?


. . . cops are the worst drivers in L.A.?


. . . A.A. members outnumber practicing alcoholics?


. . . “More Than a Feeling” by the band Boston and “Carry On My Wayward Son” by the band Kansas get more airplay than any other song on L.A. radio? And that “Back in Black” by AC/DC comes in a close third?


. . . since O.J. killed his wife, the sideline NFL commentators are glamorous white women?


. . . Johnny Mathis has the most annoying singing voice than anyone on the planet, including Sting, Bono and Kenny G’s goddamn saxophone?


. . . Chris Penn is a better actor than Sean Penn?


. . . all lower-rank Scientologists smoke more than Humphrey Bogart?


. . . L.A. hasn’t had an NFL football team since the Raiders left?


. . . maybe spray paint ought to be illegal?


. . . Tommy Chong got screwed?


. . . groping is in vogue?


. . . Pringles potato chips have never changed?


. . . there is a barrage of lists this time of year?