Girls, Girls, GirlsLast week was downright tame when it came to tabloid tart/’tard news in L.A. (Britney’s still wigged out and in rehab, and Paris got stopped for driving without her headlights on — heathen! — prompting the Associated Press to break its Hilton-news blackout). Like we said, tame. We wondered if Brit’s fellow rehabutante Lindsay Lohan might come through with some liquored-up lunacy as we awaited her DJ set with Steve Aoki at Les Deux last Wednesday night, but no such luck. LL not only looked lucid, she looked lovely — a fact many couldn’t ignore, shamelessly shooting pics or just staring at the DJ booth as La Lohan donned headphones and attempted to rock the crowd (with Kid Millionaire’s help on the Serato, of course).

The party, Mean magazine’s “Milk & Cookies” (the choco-chip was yummy), had just the right ratio of hip & messy and rich & dressy, plus a smattering of B-listers bumpin’ around the bottle-service tables — including Rachel Hunter,Laura Prepon, Jeffree Star, Pauly Shore and Jo de la Rosa from The Real Housewives of Orange County (notably, in the same brown satin dress she wears in the TV promos for the show — major fashion faux pas!). Sure was crowded behind the decks too, what with Whitestarr singer/Mischa Barton–ex Cisco Adler hovering and whispering (sweet nothings?) in Lohan’s ear and West mag’s “It” girl Cory Kennedy chillin’ like a villain in a pop-artish Jeremy Scott sweatshirt that looked like a Snickers wrapper. Not sure what to make of the youngster’s style-icon status, but her Scott frock was definitely sweet. So were Lohan’s selections (Bob Marley, Jet, No Doubt, Men at Work, Lionel Richie) just the right balance of cool and kitschy — though it would have been nice to hear more than 15 seconds of each! (We get it, she’s got eclectic taste.) Of course, self-indulgent DJ sets, especially when celebs and musicians are involved, are de rigueur these days.

Our next stop that hump night: the Beauty Bar’s seventh-anniversary gathering, where She Wants Revenge’s Adam 12 hit the decks (he’s been spinning everywhere lately!) with a set of seamlessly mixed, nearly full-length cuts. The crowd — the usual B.B. stew of tatted chicks, scruffy cats and Hollywood Blvd. riffraff — was nice and sauced by the time we got there, and the dance floor was one hot mess. We’d started taking photos of the juiced-up, ironic (we think) dance moves when a cute blonde gave us a great idea: “This would be a huge hit on YouTube,” she said. She was sooo right. We’ll definitely be back with a video camera. (Owner Paul Devitt, in town from NYC, promises the Austin B.B. will be even more pandemonious later this month when it hosts parties with Urb, Puma and Iheartcomix during the upcoming South by Southwest music festival.)

Hear Them RoarAs expected, ladies definitely outnumbered gents at the opening-night bash for MOCA’s new exhibit, “WACK! Art & the Feminist Revolution,” last Saturday. The line to get in was one of longest we’ve ever seen for an event at the Little Tokyo location, and that was just for the outdoor area, where Le Tigre’s JD Samson and Johanna Fateman were deejaying. To actually view the exhibit, there was another Disneyland-like snake twisting around the perimeter of the party. So yeah, we didn’t see the art, but we did see lots of arty outfits on lots of fierce females — the best of which was worn by MOCA event coordinator Vanessa Gonzalez (who, like Kennedy, has recently been getting press for her fabulousness). “Courtney Love?” we asked the bubbly blonde, done up in a flashy gown, tiara and runny mascara. “No, I’m a prom queen gone bad,” she explained. (Good thing too: After all, Love is a nemesis of Le Tigre’s Kathleen Hanna.) Oh, and since we’re judging everyone’s deejaying skills this week, Samson and Fateman were awesome, spinning a mash of roaring-woman rock, including Aretha, Blondie and Cindy Lauper (“She Bop!”), and even pumping out some of the same cuts as Lohan a few nights earlier. Both played remixes of ?Gwen Stefani’s (feminist anthem?) “Hollaback Girl.” That shit is bananas! Speaking of which: Spritely DJ Tina T also spun “Hollaback Girl” (as well as an inspired mix of “Milkshake” and “Smells Like Teen Spirit”) at the L.A.Weekly’s DJ Spinoff (Thursday at Holly’s), winning a trip to spin at the Ultra Music Festival in Miami. [You go, girl! — ed.]

Ladies (and gents) of the NightYou won’t hear Gwen on the sound system at Bordello (formerly Little Pedro’s) downtown, but you will see puh-lenty of her signature retro-red lipstick. The space, which looks like a fancy red-and-black brothel, seems to be taking over where The Derby left off, with a definite emphasis on the swing scene (thanks to former Derby dude Tony Gower, who co-owns it with Dana Hollister of Cliff’s Edge, Jim Venetos of Brite Spot and urban planner Elisabeth Peterson). We caught Eddie Nichols’ Rockin’ Royal Revue — basically a reincarnation of Royal Crown Revue — on a recent Saturday, and the slick-and-sassy scenesters were really jumpin’ up a storm. We were fans of Li’l P’s lowbrow charm, but we gotta admit, the new vibe works. Peterson says they met with the locals, from gangbangers to loft-dwelling art tarts, to make sure they were okay with the changes, but it’s what they didn’t change that’s probably helped most: cheap drinks! We’ll definitely be swinging — and swigging — here again soon.

LA Weekly