The scariest thing you could see tonight is an LAPD unit in your rear view.

So don't be that drunk idiot for Halloween. And if you are, try a taxi, Uber, Lyft or a sober friend. Just in case you don't get that message, Los Angeles police are warning that they'll be on the streets not only tonight but throughout the weekend, looking to show you what a real house of horrors their jail cells are.

Here's your 411 for fright night and beyond:

Today: While LAPD doesn't call it a “saturation patrol” — the department's descriptor for a DUI crackdown that includes extra patrols — you can bet officers will be out in force for Halloween. Here's what LAPD does say in a statement:

In an effort to keep the streets of Los Angeles safe on Halloween, the LAPD will have officers conducting traffic enforcement throughout the day, focusing on speed, right of way and pedestrian violations.

Friday will then bring a full-on DUI checkpoint on Sunset Boulevard at Ogden Drive in partytown, aka Hollywood. It will be happening from 8 p.m. to 2 a.m.

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Saturday from 8 p.m. to 2 a.m. they'll be doing the drunk-driver checkpoint thing again, this time on Roscoe Boulevard at Gloria Avenue in North Hills.

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The horror.

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