Like a thousand pound anvil dropping out of the sky, Coachella is coming and there's nothing anybody can do about it.
So we might as well embrace the insanity. Which is why, as always, L.A. Weekly and our sister paper OC Weekly are sending a team of writers and photographers to document the experience. Refer back to this link to stay abreast.
Next, you're probably wondering whether or not you should bring drugs.
For those of you who insist on wacky tobaccy or something stronger, here's how to not get in trouble with the police. Seriously, though, avoid ecstasy and, for God's sake, lean; we love you and want you to remain on this Earth.
Also, whether sober or not, stay hydrated – you can't bring in beverages, but you can bring in an empty bottle, for the refill stations. You can also have a “medium” backpack, but no flags – Coachella's FAQ explains specifically what's permitted through the gates.
But what to wear?
Don't forget that, as hot as it gets during the day, it gets just as cold at night. If you're simply packing your suitcase with Victoria's Secret bikini tops and jean shorts, you're doing it wrong. Our recommendation? A bandanna to wear over your nose and mouth helps filter out the dust.
Bonus: Judge those around you using our Coachella Bingo cards.
Ok, so that's your reading list! Stay tuned to this channel, and, if you see two men from Georgia claiming to be your neighbor, be sure to lend them some sugar.