The clock is ticking, and even if you don't have a (clever) costume yet, it's time to brave your social fear and figure out what the Hell you're gonna do this Halloween weekend. As far as dance dens go, pretty much everything bubbling this weekend will have a creep factor (more than usual in Hollywood!). Here, an expansive if somewhat selective list of terrorific options for everyone -from g(ravers), dragsters and glamsters to time-warpers, blood suckers, and of course, boo!-balicious babes- along with our favorite fiendish fliers.

FRI. & SAT.:

The Church Fri., Oct. 30: Danse Macabre, from Shits & Giggles and Jelly Roll, will bring out the mixed crowds and party monster set with performances by The Lady Tigra, Wet Look and Jer Ber Jones (dont miss his Halloween shows this weekend at the Cavern Club, by the way). Hot sounds from Christine Renee, Travis “TK” Disco, Aaron Castle, Chris Bowen, and Victor Rodriguez. Get tix here.

Sat., Oct. 31: Kiss N Grind's Halloween Heat has Jody Watley headlining. The night of (haunted) soul features sets Vikter Duplaix & Rashida plus special guests “raising spirits” with soul, funk, disco and house beats. Fusicology.

Both of the above at 606 E 6th St., dwntwn.

Highlands Halloweekend Fri., Oct. 30: Straight from Vegas, Beachers Madhouse Costume Ball comes to tinseltown with a Circus-like affair featuring oompa loopas, magicians, stilt walkers, monkeys, contortionists, human statues, fire breathers and more. Every half hour throughout the night, several feature acts will take the main stage. DJs and sexy go-gos get the dancefloor freakin.' Sat., Oct. 31: Playboy's Lingerie & Costume Ball promises plenty of Hollywood Blvd. hookerwear and $1000 for the naughtiest, sexiest costume. Inside the Hollywood & Highlands building, 6801 Hollywood Blvd.

LADead DJ Xian's got two goth-o-ramas this weekend. Fri., Oct. 30: The Grimm Fairytale Ball at Ruin entrances with a macabre “once upon a time” theme and fanciful freaks haunting the dance floor to '80's, darkwave, industrial, and electro fantasy. Xian and Baron spin sounds to heat up your cold black heart. At the Monte Cristo, 3100 Wilshire Blvd. Sat., Oct. 31: Night of the LA Dead possesses the hidden downtown environs of The Bridge with similarly dark delights all night and into the after hours. Just make sure to leave before the sun rises! 1356 Palmetto St., dwntwn.

Pandora's Box Halloween The internet radio fave hosts a pop-up party at the beauteous venue called Vibiana all week, ending with two nights of Halloween hedonism. Fri., Oct. 30: the Vampire Masquerade Ball will take a bite out of the night with The Toledo Show, a costume contest/fashion walk-off and a swingin 1920s theme complete with flappers and live big band sounds. Sat., Oct. 31: Asher Roth pops into Pandora's pumpkin patch, after which, the club shuts down. 210 S. Main St., dwntwn. Pandora Nightlife.

Miss Kitty's Parlour Kitty's crowd always dress up, but on the ultimate fright night, all bets -and fishnets- are off. The wild nu-disco/electro bump box offers two nights of mayhem this year. Fri., Oct. 30, there's burlesque performances and a co$tume conte$t. Sat., Oct. 31, a set by Godhead and Devil's Playground's Courtney Cruz. DJs Barbeau, Riley More and Slash Fiction spin purr-fect mixes. At the Dragonfly, 6510 Santa Monica Blvd. Miss Kitty's Parlour.

Ecco Danny B's long-running Heaven & Hell bash splits into two tarty parties this year. Fri., Oct. 30, Cirque de Soleil's Kooza co-hosts and Zen Freedman and The Eye Candy Twins spin Heaven-ly sounds. Sat., Oct. 31, Hell promises True Blood cast members (it's Mehcad “Eggs” Brooks b-day) and “the #1 adult film stars” plus Eric Cubeechee on the decks. 1640 N. Cahuenga Blvd. Ecco Hollywood.

Hard Haunted Mansion

The one spot your “ironic hipster” costume probably wont fly, this electro-extravaganza nonetheless has a ridiculously body-rockin' line-up both nights. Fri., Oct. 30: Deadmau5, 2ManyDjs, and A-Trak headline. Sat., Oct. 31: Justice, Bassment Jaxx, and Steve Aoki make the masked masses (and too cool for a costume kiddies) sweat. At the Shrine, 665 W Jefferson Blvd., dwntwn. Hard Haunted Mansion.

SAT., OCT. 31

Monster Massive If the Hard Haunted Mansion (above) is Freddy Krueger, then the Massive is definitely Friday the 13th's Jason. Can't remember who won that epic evil battle, but when it comes to this one, MM's line-up is undeniably killer: Armin Van Burren, Sasha, Pete Tong, Felix da Housecat, Crystal Castles, Steve Lawler, and M.A.N.D.Y. to name a few. Los Angeles Sports Arena, 3911 S. Figueroa St., dwntwn; Sat., Oct. 31. Monster Massive.

Haus of Horror WeHo's Halloween parade always has the city's most bodacious costumes, and while the masses will flock to circuit stops along the boulevard, we suggest a more stylish fete to fiend on. Hosted by Billy Burgess' Society, this one's got DJs Travis “TK” Disko, Chris Bowen, and Nelstar, plus live attacks by Lisa D'Amato, Limp Wristed and Hector Extravaganza, and of course, fierce get-ups. At Crown Bar, 7321 Santa Monica Blvd.; Sat., Oct. 31. Society Productions.

KCRW's Masquerade The Legendary Park Plaza serves as backdrop for this eclectic, eccentric mix of amusements including DJ Shadow (DJ set), Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros, Little Dragon and Sea Wolf. KCRW DJs, including Jason “Nosferatu” Bentley, Anne “Elvira” Litt, Garth “The Thriller” Trinidad, Raul “Ghoul” Campos tingle your spine and more on the floor. Kogi, Border Grill, Coolhaus and Sprinklesmobile trucks on site. 607 S. Park View St. KCRW Masquerade (For more details, view Drew Tewksbury's post.)

Thriller Night Break out the sparkly gloves, red leather jackets and white face power for this tribute to the King of Pop and his video classic. Michael Jackson dance and costume contests, and of course, lots of his music (spun by Casey Connor) all night. At Dakota Lounge, 1026 Wilshire Blvd., Santa Monica. Dakota Lounge or (310) 393-8200.

Freaks Fest A carnal carnival featuring porn stars and pop hits, hip-hop, and '90's jams galore on the floor, this one boasts $5,000 in decorations, state-of-the-art lighting, games and concessions, plus a $1,000 Sexiest Costume contest. 1119 S. Olive St., dwntwn. Freak Fest.

The Black Pearl This Jack Sparrow-esque experience offers 17th century ship décor, performers, live dancers, aerialists, stuntmen, dancing to DJ/remixer Sleeper and a mega-midnight performance sure to shiver your timbers. At Boulevard 3, 6523 W. Sunset Blvd., Hlwyd. Boulvebard 3 or (323) 466-2144.

Hollywood's Haunted Mansion Enter this multi-level affair (adjacent to Blvd. 3 above) if you dare. Fortune tellers, laser and light shows, painted artists, and performers are part of the evil eve. “Top DJs” spin hip hop, old school, 80s, rock & house all night long. At Social, 6525 Sunset Blvd. Omers Productions.

King Tut's Tomb Hollywood promoters from the Sunset Room, White Lotus, Cabana Club, Ritual, Halo, and Green Door invite you to walk like an… you know… at the Egyptian Theatre's Courtyard. “Too Sexy” guys Right Said Fred play at midnight and LA's decksmiths including DJ Prophet spin Top 40/Hip-Hop/Dance music fit for a pharaoh. Prizes for best historic costumes throughout the night. At the Egyptian Theater, 6712 Hollywood Blvd. King Tut's Tomb.

Ghostly Equestrian Ball Bar Sinister's dark and lovely crowd joins forces with the hard hitters from Bondage Ball for this wild ride. Bauhaus' David J performs along with pianist Jill Tracy, and DJs spin a web of goth, trance and darkwave. Absinthe drinks, fetish playrooms and a 3D haunted photo booth make an atmosphere that's anything but restrained. No cameras allowed. At Boardners, 1652 N. Cherokee, Hlywd. Bar Sinister.

DASK Hollywood Halloween Extravaganza Erotic and exotic costumes are encouraged at this monstrous mash on Melrose (touting itself as an alternative to Hollywood Blvd's traffic-y madness) featuring multiple DJs and dance floors. Sexy go-go's and pole dancers should make this a (ho)rror house. At El Guapo, 7250 Melrose Ave. DASK.

Trashy Lingerie's Annual Halloween Costume Ball100 “Trashy Lingerie” models, a performance by the Darling Stilettos with Velvet Revolver's Matt Sorum on the skins, and the best “barley there” costumes in town according to the invite. At the Key Club, 9039 W. Sunset Blvd. Key Club.

All Hallows Eve at the Edison Dead bodies were found at this converted power station when they started renovation, so who knows what ghosts might emerge here on Halloween? Guests are invited to come in their “Steampunk best” and win big prizes for the “best original, glamorous or ghoulish” costume. DJ Imagika spins the hypnotic dance sounds and an array of contortionists, aerialists, and eccentriques are promised. 108 W. 2nd St., dwntwn. Edison or 213-613-000.

Scream 5 This gruesome-themed gathering aims to make ya wail with a “$5000 money drop,” lingerie fashion show, snacks and treats and DJs spinning crowd pleasing sounds (hip-hop, electro, rock mashups, etc) in three dance areas. At Arena, 6655 Santa Monica Blvd. Scream 5.

Halloween at the Roosevelt The hills have eyes (and all eyes will surely be on The Hills' stars in attendance) as this celeb-friendly/fiendy fete hosted by The Alliance, Frankie Delgado and Homemade Events takes over the entire hotel. DJs include Biz Markie, Them Jeans, the EC Twins and more TBA. 7000 Hollywood Blvd. Homemade LA.

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