If I had known that that the hilariously loony stuff that comes out of the mouths of people related to me could be my ticket to a book deal and TV show, America would have become huge fans of George and Patty Molyneaux's Cocktail Hour Bon Mots a long time ago, and “I'll just have a half” would be a popular catch-phrase. Justin Halpern knew that the utterances of his 74-year-old father must be shared with the world when he started his blog, Shit My Dad Says. Some faves: “It's Los Angeles, son. It's the epicenter of the asshole earthquake. They'd fuck you twice if they had another dick.” And: “A parent's only as good as their dumbest kid. If one wins a Nobel Prize but the other gets robbed by a hooker, you failed.” Now there's a book, Shit My Dad Says, and even a TV show in the works starring William Shatner. Halpern signs at Vroman's. Of the book, Dad quipped, “Your mom just ordered 35 copies of your book. I'm not paying for one. Fucking. Copy. Mine's free.”

Wed., May 12, 7 p.m., 2010

Advertising disclosure: We may receive compensation for some of the links in our stories. Thank you for supporting LA Weekly and our advertisers.