What will you be and where will you go this Halloween? The choices are as daunting as they are haunting. As far as dance dens go, pretty much everything bubbling this weekend will have a creep factor (and we’re not talking about Ed Hardy–clad douche bags, unless it’s a costume!). Here, some terrorific options for the g(ravers), gay ghouls and glamsters — and even the half-naked hordes and hotties heading to Hollywood. (See LAWeekly.com’s West Coast Sound music blog for a full list of freak-fests.)

If the HARD Haunted Mansion (see Music Pick) is Freddy Krueger, then the Monster Massive is definitely Friday the 13th’s Jason. Can’t remember who won that epic evil battle, but when it comes to this one, MM’s lineup is undeniably killer: Armin Van Burren, Sasha, Pete Tong, Felix da Housecat, Crystal Castles, Steve Lawler and M.A.N.D.Y., to name a few. Los Angeles Sports Arena, 3911 S. Figueroa St., dwntwn.; Sat., Oct. 31; monstermassive.com.

The crowd at Miss Kitty’s Parlour always dresses up, but on the ultimate fright night, all bets — and fishnets — are off. The wild nu-disco/electro bump box offers two nights of mayhem this year. On Friday, there are burlesque performances and a co$tume conte$t. On Saturday, groove to a set by Godhead and Devil’s Playground’s Courtney Cruz. DJs Barbeau, Riley More and Slash Fiction spin purr-fect mixes. Dragonfly, 6510 Santa Monica Blvd., L.A.; Sat., Oct. 31; misskittysparlour.com.

Danny B’s long-running Heaven & Hell bash at Ecco splits into two tarty parties this year. On Friday, Cirque du Soleil’s Kooza co-hosts and Zen Freeman and the Eye Candy Twins spin Heaven-ly sounds. On Saturday, Hell promises True Blood cast members (it’s Mehcad “Eggs” Brooks’ b-day) and “the No. 1 adult film stars,” plus Eric Cubeechee on the decks. 1640 N. Cahuenga Blvd., Hlywd.; eccohollywood.com; Sat., Oct. 31.

WeHo’s Halloween parade always has the city’s most bodacious costumes, and while the masses will flock to circuit stops along the boulevard, we suggest a more stylish fete to fiend on at Haus of Horror. Hosted by Billy Burgess’ Society, this one’s got DJs Travis “TK” Disko, Chris Bowen and Nelstar, plus live attacks by Lisa D’Amato, Limp Wristed and Hector Extravaganza, and, of course, fierce getups. Crown Bar, 7321 Santa Monica Blvd., W. Hlywd.; Sat., Oct. 31; societyproductions.com.

LA Weekly