Here's a novel way to get bacon into your body. Like the American Express Black Card, which was an urban legend long before it was a real product, bacon lube is finally real — and it wasn't dreamed up by George Costanza.

Manufactured by J&D's, which impressed us with their Bacon Popcorn but is best known for making Bacon Salt, baconlube started out as an April Fool's Day joke. Now, you can buy a 2 oz. bottle of the totally vegan, water-based lubricant for $11.99 (or $59.99 for a six-pack, for really vigorous lovers). We can finally stop bringing our skillet into the boudoir. Or not.

Explaining the product's genesis, J&D writes on their website:

baconlube began as an elaborate April Fool's prank and was never intended to be a real product. But when the joke ended, the emails kept coming. People harassed us via email, in public and in highly inappropriate ways (thanks for that)…

So who's responsible for this highly anticipated creation actually coming to life? You are, that's who. You and an intern named Martin actually, who sacrificed and offended his taste buds in the name of science.

Thanks, Martin. You've added a sensual new meaning to the phrase, “Smell's like bacon!”

Elina Shatkin is a staff writer at LA Weekly. Follow her at @elinashatkin or contact her at

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