There are only a couple of times a year that we actually propose the arduous drive from L.A. out to San Bernardino for dance events, and this week is definitely one of them. Insomniac’s Audiotistic Festival promises a megapacked mess of DJs and beat-driven acts ranging from techno-punks to hip-hop jammers, all with one crucial common thread: They’ll jiggle your junk nonstop. The lineup is pretty mind-blowing, actually: The Roots (taking a weekend break from Jimmy Fallon), Above & Beyond, Z Trip, Talib Kweli with DJ Hi Tek, Chromeo, Amanda Blank, Flosstradamus, Them Jeans, Aaron Lacrate, Armand Van Helden, Does It Offend You Yeah?, The Cool Kids, Goldie and others. Audio-tastic is more like it. NOS Events Center, 689 S. E St., San Bernardino; Sat., May 9, 7 p.m.-4 a.m. Some of the above acts are sure to head into Hollywood for some partying later in the week, and Mad Mondays should top the list. The rager marks its first anniversary with residents and surprise guests this week, plus a photo exhibit from Shadowscene (shown previously at the Standard downtown) and makeup makeovers. Standard West Hollywood, 8300 W. Sunset Blvd.; Mon., May 11, art show in hotel lobby (8-10 p.m.), dancing in Purple Room (10 p.m.-2 a.m.). RSVP at

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