Our worst fears, confirmed again: Impossibly irritating “comedian” Andy Dick is also a drunk A-hole!

Dick was arrested by Temecula police at a Marie Calender's restaurant in Riverside County last night, where officials say he was “intoxicated” and “causing a disturbance” in the bar area at the shamefully early hour of 9 p.m.

First things first: Marie Calender's has a bar area? What? And people go there? On a Monday night?

Leave it to Andy Dick, who at least offers a disclaimer on his Twitter masthead:

law logo2x bThis isn't the first time Dick has been caught drunk A-holing around town. In 2008, he pleaded guilty to public intoxication outside another Riverside County bar, and just last year, he was charged with sexual abuse for feeling up a West Virginia bouncer.

Oh — he's also been to rehab nine times (including reality-show rehab, with Dr. Drew) and busted for drunk driving/marijuana possession. In 2009, he said on Tyra Banks' talkshow, “I know that I'm ready to turn a corner with my alcoholism because I'm willing to talk about it.”

That worked out nicely, didn't it? Here's last night's police report (somehow, he was bailed for a measly $500, according to CBS):

On arrival, officers learned a patron, identified as Andy Dick, was intoxicated and causing a disturbance in the bar area. Mr. Dick displayed the objective symptoms associated with alcohol intoxication, and he was unable to care for his own safety. As a result, Mr. Dick was arrested for 647(f) P.C. (Public Intoxication).

Come on, man. You're 45 and your most recent gig was the voice of Boingo the Bunny in “Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil.” Time to lay off the cake shots.

A little background on Andy's, uh, insatiable urges, from a 2009 piece in the New York Daily News:

Dick … says [Dr.] Drew's house is no fun thanks to the “no sex” rule.

“He's got the animal caged,” Dick says of Dr. Drew. “I'm under his care officially and he's like, 'Look, folks … he ain't gonna attack.'”

And as a self-proclaimed “tri-sexual”, the comic says he has no shortage of temptation.

“I'll try anything,” he told Banks. “I really have tried everything, except nothing with animals. There's only room for one animal — that would be me.”

Clearly.

Just another case for Dick replacing Sheen on “Two and a Half Men,” carrying on the show's rich legacy of drunk Los Angeles A-holes.

[@simone_electra/swilson@laweekly.com]

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