And the Oscar Goes To….Lina Lecaro, for being the only member of the Style Council sober enough to actually write anything on Oscar night.

We had such grand plans, there was even talk of providing our devoted reader(s) with a live blog about the ceremony. But the furthest we got with that was Linda typing “Jon Stewart=funny” and “Jack Nicholson fingered Keira Knightley”. After that, the wine and the mimosas took over…and soon it was a case of “readers? schmeaders.”

Oh and by the way, fuck Vanity Fair – the hottest post-awards party in town last night was at the Akbar in Silverlake where, for some reason unknown to man, a very bouffant-haired Peaches was DJing…if you happened to have been there last night, we were the two drunk girls falling over – literally – on the dancefloor, one of us (Linda) wearing a sweat-stained “Creme of the Crop” T-Shirt and the other (me) rockin a strange assymetrical Edward Scissorhands haircut (that's what happens when you volunteer to be a student's model at Vidal Sassoon).

I think even Peaches was a little scared.

In an Oscar nutshell –

THUMBS UP to Reese Witherspoon, who won the Style Council Award for Best Acceptance Speech  – she managed to thank everyone in the world without sounding insincere or putting the audience to sleep.

THUMBS DOWN to the LA Times for Least Inspired Use of Vocabulary in Red Carpet Reportage.  No doubt under pressure to file her copy, reporter Mimi was clipped and somewhat over-concise in her descriptions of guests' attire – Tim Burton's shirt was merely “very red”. And Helena Bonham Carter's gown, a shimmery prom nightmare worthy of its own When Bad Dresses Happen To Good People story, was quite simply, “blue”. Mimi, may we recommend

THUMBS UP to Michelle Williams for being the most gorgeous gal on the red carpet. Despite a mean story on questioning whether the former Dawson's Creek star was “hot enough” to be Heath Ledger's girlfriend, we thought she looked smokin in her diaphanous yet attractively clingy lemon gown. We loved her show-stopping use of cardinal red lipstick too.

THUMBS DOWN to Keira Knightly, winner of the Style Council's “Most Abominable Posture Award”, as pointed out by a horrified Steffie, who does a lot of yoga. Also – what's with the unearthly not-quite-strawberry-blond-hair color?

THUMBS DOWN to Jessica Alba for hogging the red carpet limelight (we saw you workin' it) and being too dumb for words.

And finally, a big THUMBS UP to Peaches, who wins a Lifetime Acheivement Award for helping the Style Council dance the pain away…

Posted by Caroline Ryder

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