Update: 2/15/12 3:00 p.m. We should have known this was as bogus as the prospect of a goat on a leash getting down (in the video) to a band bolstered by the drumming talents of a man known to cheerily carve and cook domesticated beasts. NME was wrong and so were we. The treasures used to reside in the vault of a bank that once occupied the same site as the Manchester restaurant. Whoah.

Perhaps it's fitting that master tapes of Joy Division and New Order recordings would surface in the basement of a Manchester restaurant owned by Jamie Oliver, the once-Naked Chef and former drummer of the late and probably unlamented Brit-pop band Scarlet Division. We imagine Oliver himself dug up the tapes with his own bare, dirt-encrusted fingers. According to NME, the basement stash, which also included a pirate-like triumvirate of guns, gold and jewelry, is estimated to be worth £1.1 million. The whole find reportedly was handed off to the Treasury.

In case you're wondering, unlike Joy Division, Scarlet Division never reached iconic status — just No. 42 on the U.K. charts with a 2000 single called “Sundial.” Think that goat (or is it a sheep?) that appears at around 1:53 is destined for a roasting pit, or, in Oliver parlance, a “whack” in the oven? Also funny: In the comments for the YouTube-hosted video, one droll contributor notes: “The singer looks like Nigella Lawson … just saying.”

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