At some point in L.A.’s noir past, a young dreamer named Dick Watson pulled into Union Station to make it big in L.A. theater — not as an actor, but as a stage manager. Unfortunately, Dick was a crappy stage manager who blew cues left and right, killing dozens of shows across town. He worked so much because he worked for free — he figured at least that would be a smart move. One day, during the drought of ’43, his body was found rotting in the dried sludge of the L.A. River. The last words anybody remembers him saying were “Cue 27, fade to black, go.” That was in the middle of Nina’s great Act 1 monologue in Chekhov’s The Seagull.

Join Culture Clash and guests for a merciless grilling of artistic directors, to figure out what they know about this scandalous unsolved mystery, when Culture Clash hosts the 28th annual L.A.Weekly Theater Awards on Monday, April 9, at the Music Box @ Fonda, 6126 Hollywood Boulevard (near Gower). Doors open at 6:30 p.m.; the show starts at 7:30 p.m. All tickets include catered after-party. If you don’t dress in ’40s attire, people will think you’re in costume, which will make you a suspect.

The awards honor excellence in Los Angeles theaters of 99 seats or less, in productions that opened between January 1 and December 31, 2006.

Tickets for nominees are free. Nominees, RSVP to (323) 993-3693, and somebody will confirm your reservation within a week. You are a nominee if your name appears on the list below or if, in the categories of Production of the Year, Revival Production of the Year or Musical of the Year, you are named in the program of the nominated show as an actor, designer, producer, director, writer, choreographer or stage manager. You are a nominee if, in the category of Production Design, you are listed in the program of the nominated show as a producer, director or designer. Finally, you are a nominee if, in the categories of Ensemble or Comedy Ensemble, your name appeared in the program of the nominated show as an actor.

Tickets for all guests and for the general public are available for $18.50 plus handling fees, through www.theatremania.com. If you have any difficulties purchasing tickets, or any further questions, please call the Theater Awards hot line: (323) 993-3693.

PRODUCTION OF THE YEAR

REVIVAL PRODUCTION OF THE YEAR (of a ?20th- or 21st-century work)

MUSICAL OF THE YEAR

DIRECTION

COMEDY DIRECTION

ONE-ACT DIRECTION

MUSICAL DIRECTION

ENSEMBLE

MUSICAL ENSEMBLE

COMEDY ENSEMBLE

ONE-ACT ENSEMBLE

LEADING FEMALE PERFORMANCE

LEADING MALE PERFORMANCE

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE

SUPPORTING MALE PERFORMANCE

SUPPORTING FEMALE PERFORMANCE

SOLO PERFORMANCE

ONE-ACT PERFORMANCE

PLAY WRITING

CAREER ACHIEVEMENT

QUEEN OF THE ANGELS

PRODUCTION DESIGN

ADAPTATION

LIGHTING DESIGN

COSTUME DESIGN

SET DESIGN

SOUND DESIGN

CHOREOGRAPHY

FIGHT CHOREOGRAPHY

SPECIAL RECOGNITION

ORIGINAL MUSIC

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