[Editor's note: Odd Future member Lionel Boyce writes a weekly column for West Coast Sound. His archives are available here.]

For those of you who don't know, which would be everybody, seeing that I never mentioned it to anyone, I have been on the national U.S. tour with OF.

We are only two weeks in but there have already been a lot of “shit got real” moments. But I'll save those stories for another column. For now I will just give a rundown of everyone traveling with me.

Tyler: He tries to find the most popular drug in each city we go to. So far it has been meth.

Mike G: I am convinced he does not sleep, no matter what time it is: 6 a.m. or 3 p.m., he is awake. He's not human.

Hodgy Beats: He left the tour to become a professional in-line skater.

Left Brain: He is a really good cook. He makes steaks on the bus that are all that and a bag of chips! It kinda caught me off guard.

Domo Genesis: He lures people in to play NBA2K12 and talks a lot of crap to them while he beats them. It's pretty funny to watch.

Syd: People have been going crazy when they see her. She's a superstar.

Jasper Dolphin: Two and a half words — Life of the Party.

Taco: He's not on the entire tour due to his break-dancing career, but he'll be in some of the cities.

Matt Martians: One of the members of the Super 3. For a guy who's bald, he has good music selections. Usually if you're a bald black guy, you only listen to funk music.

If you do not know who any of the people mentioned above are, then you probably have never heard of Milli Vanilli before, either.

Lucas: Me and him run shit over at the merch booth. For some reason black girls seem to like him. (He's the skinny white blond guy.) They've been going crazy over him.

Brick: The tour manager. He gets things done — you can catch him power-walking at all times because he means business.

Clancy: The manager. You say anything bad about the Eagles to him and you run a chance of getting punched out.

Kelly: She is awesome, one of my favorite peeps on the tour. She keeps it G.

Brad: This guy is really tight, he always has a cool-ass story for every situation.

Linda: She is the driver of our tour bus, she has a country accent, but I'm not too sure where it's from. I would ask her, but I think it'd be cooler if I just assumed. I'll just say she has a Minnesota accent for now.

Young Nigga: He's been opening for Odd Future at select shows with his hype man L-Boy, basically whenever he feels like shutting it down. Those guys are wild. -L-Boy

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