LA Weekly |
| Britt Chester |
| Nickelback |
By Adam Steininger
In the wake of the showerless grunge era of the early '90s, a slew of post-grunge bands emerged with diluted, watered-down ditties, all seemingly revolving around suffering through romance. It's not that these bands were bad, it's just that their music was bad.
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10. Candlebox
Jumping on the grunge bandwagon a year before Cobain's death, Candlebox achieved radio hits like “You” and “Far Behind,” spitting up new pop-filled grunge and turning up the agony of love lyrics to charm romantics. Their formula was skim milk, lacking any versatility and creativity when it came to songwriting.
9. Three Days Grace
Trying to front as an aggressive alternative rock band, Three Days Grace's lyrics were forgettable, and their riffs sound just like their last song — and the song before that, and the song before that.
8. 3 Doors Down
3 Doors Down churns out three chord riffs, Matchbox Twenty vocals and songs you forget by the next song. “Kryptonite” was one of those songs radio stations couldn't stop playing, and if you've already unintentionally heard it a million times, you've already hear the best of this band.
7. Finger Eleven
Finger Eleven took post-grunge off the road down into a stripped quarry of pop rock. “Paralyzer” (above) has lines like: “Well, I'm not paralyzed/But I seem to be struck by you/I want to make you move/Because you're standing still.” Bleck!
6. Bush
Bush, from England, invaded American airwaves within months of the fall of grunge. Their dreamy frontman? He looked like that one dick from high school.
5. Live
Technically Live emerged during the grunge era, but they didn't really take flight until afterward. Their lyrics were trying to be poetic, but came off as over-dramatization. Live, like others, was hoping to be the next Nirvana, not aware that they had already strangled the essence of grunge.
4. Puddle of Mudd
Still an existing band, Puddle of Mudd rolled in with an even more watered down post-grunge sound than most. Perhaps what you might expect from a band signed to Fred Durst's label. Ooh, burn!
3. Lifehouse
By early 2000, a good dark thing like grunge was cleaned up to a bad light-blinding sub-subset. No one exemplified that more than Lifehouse.
2. Creed
If Creed could really stop time like in that one video, they could find the time to realize they are singing the wrath of God to their followers. Who crowd surfs to Creed? Can you take them higher with arms wide open?
1. Nickelback
Nickleback is the undisputed, reigning, featherweight champion, punching bag of post-grunge. Sex and rock and roll have gone together since grandpas and grandmas roamed the earth, but Nickelback's lyrics objectify women in a particularly obnoxious way. The weird thing is that their female fans haven't slapped them back for this behavior. Nickelback's musicianship is as annoyingly noisy as American travelers, yet as dull as dishwater.
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