Andrew SimmonsCombing through Craigslist's Farm and Garden Classifieds gives an Internet prowler a case of the chuckles. Some people yuck at the writing, but for us, the wares themselves (see pig statue entry) and the vendors' keen marketing ploys (see llama entry) are enough. Seriously though, seeing what people around the region are selling online gives one insight into the shifting seasons, small farm economics, and the kind of community Craigslist can foster. Ever seen 24 Hours on Craigslist? Well, this is the agrarian-themed, seven-day spin-off: Turn the page for five of our favorite Craigslist ads from the past week….
Scobies; Credit: artsdio/flickr
5. On Craigslist, one can find kombucha scobies nearly as easily as anonymous sex and bad roommates. My late grandfather would have called this a California thing. This week, an Encino man was pushing “very pure and healthy” ones for $10 a pop. “Must sell because I have more than I need,” he says, and we imagine a closet stacked high with undulating beige frisbees.
4. Over in Long Beach, a miniature one-year-old thoroughly immunized pot belly pig is selling for $1000. We're guessing the vendor is expecting the buyer to have little pink piggy-style sweaters and pet names on the brain, not a lechon for two. Interestingly, the pig is originally from Hawaii, which makes us wonder if it wasn't procured in a late-night jungle hunt and smuggled back to the mainland in a well-ventilated suitcase.
3. When you think of delivery chicken, forget some shriveled, meekly sauced wings riding shotgun to a limp Domino's pie. If, dreaming of feathery comfort and an endless parade of fresh eggs, you respond to this ad by Dare 2 Dream Farms in Lompoc, your chicken might hop out of the box and peck you in your urban farmin' face. White Leghorns? Rhode Island Reds? Blue Laced Red Wyandottes? The list of breeds is long. There is a two-chicken minimum and a $15 delivery fee as well.
The cherimoya of Mark Twain's eye.; Credit: djeucalyptus/flickr
2. According to this ad, Mark Twain once described the cherimoya fruit as “deliciousness itself.” He may have actually said it was “the most delicious fruit known to man,” but either way we're taking his assessment of Peru's perfumed pride with a grain of salt. After all, the guy was a bit of a quote-whore. Given his insights on watermelons and whiskey, the cherimoya couldn't have been a major priority. He was like an assembly line. Anyway, seeds are selling, ten for $4.
1. So, let's say you can't spring for a pot bellied pig plucked from the wilds of the Big Island. Why not go with a life-sized stone statue of a pig? It'll cost you $650 but at least you will be able to save those table scraps you're dying not to get rid of. Not buying it? It was either this or a “lucrative stud llama“ who can fill “a bucket a day” with fertilizer.
Stud llama; Credit: bookbutterfly90/flickr
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