Maybe the Food Network — or any of the other networks that are currently scrambling to get their share of the reality food television audience — should just give Stephen Colbert his own DIY cooking show. After cutting sandwiches with an ice skate at the Olympics, the host of Colbert Nation is now making salsas on his show, also with interesting utensils. Last night he used an iPad to mince the vegetables. Next time Colbert could get Glenn Beck to chop mirepoix with a Kindle. Everybody needs a sous chef, and Beck can always blame his tears on the onions.

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