This weekend we read of guitarist Slash's realty woes, and the world's tiniest string section played in the background as the story unfolded. Now, we love Slash. He's by far both the best Guns n Rose and the best Velvet Revolver, but part of this story is a little confusing. It seems he and his wife Perla Ferrar were looking to buy a house a few years ago in the Hollywood Hills (in fact, it may be the same one that Ellen Degeneres visited in the above clip). According an AP story, “They wanted enough size and parking for parties, but say the home was smaller than advertised and on a public street with parking restrictions. They seek more than $1 million and punitive damages.”

Now, all this is fine, and understandable, especially if you're a rock star. But our question for Slash and Perla: Did you not look at the house? Did you not negotiate a few “test parties” into your closing agreement? I mean, even rock stars need to plan ahead a little bit. Before you sign on the dotted line, make sure you can run naked down the streets of your neighborhood at all hours; make sure that you can dive from the roof into the swimming pool. Make sure there's parking. That's just common sense.

Slash, care to respond? Someone disguised as Slash feel like discussing?

Advertising disclosure: We may receive compensation for some of the links in our stories. Thank you for supporting LA Weekly and our advertisers.