We're about to OD on stupid celebrity news today, but this one's too amazing to pass up — a perfect “Game of Thrones” stabbing, involving one of Hollywood's biggest badasses, come true at some low-brow London pub. The Playboy Mansion is even involved (sort of)!

So late Sunday eve, the Daily Mail has gotten word that “Lord of the Rings” star Sean Bean was pounding 'em back at the Hill Bar and Brasserie in Camden, when a drifter outside the bar went totally Golem (whatever that means) on his Playmate girlfriend (NSFW photo after the jump!), making “lewd comments” as the couple enjoyed a fag break. This did not do good things for Bean's already-medieval testosterone levels:

As a result, Mr Bean followed the man down the road to challenge him. Later in the evening, Mr Bean went out for another cigarette and was then attacked by a man.

The star, who lives close by, was said to have been stabbed in the arm — believed to be with a broken glass — and punched in the face, according to witnesses. Police were then called.

But a few open wounds couldn't phase the scruffmeister, also known for his completely typecast roles in “Thrones” and “Age of Heroes.” According to the Daily Mail, Bean “declined to attend hospital” (who speaks shitty English now?) and “instead, the star walked back into the bar and, after staff gave him aid from a first aid kit, ordered another drink.”

Boo ya. Making J.R. proud, one chest hair at a time. And get a load of the misses, April Summers, as seen in Hugh Hefner's own:

law logo2x bAll she needs is one of those clothy corset getups and a poof of frizzed hair, and this could probably be some kind of terrible sequel. Rawr.

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