Not to be outdone by Obama and the brown-nosing Democrats, the Republican National Committee has launched a full-scale Latino outreach effort for the 2012 presidential race. At their convention this year in L.A., for the first time ever, Republicans hired a (gasp!) Spanish translator. And Univision reports that “the first state-level operatives it plans to put into the field will be tasked with reaching out to Latino voters.”

Guess when the minority starts to become the majority (or at least the swing vote), politicians have no choice but to start acknowledging their presence. Latinos even get their own GOP website…

… clunky of a URL as it may be. (Which really doesn't make any sense, seeing as LatinoRepublicans.com and RepublicanLatinos.com are still up for grabs. Looks like all D.C.'s young tech-star interns decided to “win the future” and work for Obama instead.)

Here's the final product: RNCLatinos.com. And here are our initial reactions.

• It's blue. WTF.

• Aside from the unaligned clusterfuck of text boxes and cheesy flash animations, the central headline is insanely pixelated. Jesus — they're not blind!

• Turns out classic GOP “family values” lip service is just as infuriating in Spanish.

• The “¿Quiénes Somons?” tab leads to a blank page. Blank, except for some Twitter and Facebook share memes, so visitors can direct all their friends to a blank page as well. Slick.

• Who is this targeting, again? We're pretty sure the only Latinos with the capacity to think Republican don't even speak Spanish.

• The “Temas Republicanos” tab leads to the most mind-numbing, crazy-vague list of talking points we've ever laid eyes on. In “La Economía,” we learn that Republicans want a hands-off free market economy because it will benefit consumers. (Like the country's poorest citizens will benefit from tax breaks for billionaires.) And in “La Defensa Nacional,” we get no mention of immigration enforcement whatsoever — only terrorism, nuclear war, missiles and the importance of alliances with other countries.

• The “Record de Obama” tab blames every devastating effect the Great Recession has had on Latinos on the Obama Administration. Of course, they don't mention any of the reasons Latinos are actually furious with the current regime — including its devastating deportation rate, and skirting of the DREAM Act and other sensible immigration reform, despite the president's promises — because Obama did all that largely to appease conservatives.

Which should serve as the principal disclaimer to this Dem-bashing Latino outreach effort: Everything bad that has happened to you the last three years can be blamed equally on the GOP. And if they had it their way, they would have yanked all your public assistance, besides.

In other words, neither party can be trusted, and we should all just go live at City Hall with Occupy L.A. The end.

[@simone_electra/swilson@laweekly.com]

Advertising disclosure: We may receive compensation for some of the links in our stories. Thank you for supporting LA Weekly and our advertisers.