Misanthropic masses, commence with the head-scratching. It's rumored that Mark Wahlberg has been offered the role of Eric Draven in a remake of The Crow, which may have been written by Nick Cave. Scoff, scoff.
(Sorry, we're a bit under the weather.)
Despite being a Goth cult classic, the original 1994 film is probably best known for the on-set death of Brandon Lee, the last known Draven.
The star was accidentally shot and killed during filming when the props department left a real bullet in the .44 caliber revolver that another actor was supposed to fire at him.
Even excepting the awful circumstances of Lee's death, the idea of a remake is touchy, to say the least. Eric Draven is a sacred figure to many.
The angst, the tragedy, the violence, the total badassery of his good guy-ness ... Is it any wonder that every year around Halloween, in every neighborhood, his visage gets painted across the faces of a handful of teens and nostalgic young adults?
So this raises some interesting (if not disturbing) questions:
1) If Wahlberg is Eric, will Katharine Heigl play Sarah?
2) Is Wahlberg out of New York cop roles?
3) Will they recreate the scene that caused Lee's death?
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4) Will the new soundtrack be all rapegaze?
5) And if you were in charge, who would you cast as Eric Draven?
Let us know in the comments section.