Nightranger gets invited to a shitload of shindigs, but there are only a few promoters and bashes that we’d dub clear-your-schedule-’cause-ya-can’t-miss-’em ragers, and the annual BPMmagazine anniversary celebration is definitely near the top of the list. Girl Talk put the kiddies in a tizzy last year, while Mickey Avalon worked it out the year before, so outdoing themselves this time (for their 12-year b-day) was a toughie, but we think the mag succeeded with the Bloody Beatroots, Z-Trip, DJ AM and 2 Live Crew. The skillz of AM and Z go without saying, but we have seen both phone it in (corporate bashes … who can blame ’em?). This was absolutely not the case Wednesday night – which also served as the official Hard Music Fest preparty) — as each turntable talent busted übersick mixing, matching and electro-rocious wax attacks worthy of the dance mag’s crowd. (No one played the Outfield either, thank god).

Lina Lecaro

(Click to enlarge)

Don Bolles and Noah Segan (the actor who plays him) mouth off at the What We Do Is Secret screening party.

Lina Lecaro

(Click to enlarge)

Ron Jeremy was a magnet at the BPM party.

Of course, things took a raunchy turn when 2 Live got busy, but we didn’t expect the wall of white chicks who shook their tiny butts for the band (no junk in da trunk and hardly any sistas) and flashed copious crotch shots from the stage, and even for our camera. It was a little too Girls Gone Wild for our tastes. Nightranger’s no prude, and, of course, if you’re gonna stand near the stage for the ultimate “Nasty As They Wanna Be” rap act, you gotta expect a “Ho-knee” vibe, but getting groped almost the entire time we were shooting the scene because the dudes up front couldn’t reach the gyrating exhibitionists onstage? Not cool. We deserve respect dammit, and we got it when we retreated backstage and started conversing with, believe it or not, Ron Jeremy (who introduced the Crew earlier). Though he’s becoming the Where’s Waldo of L.A. nightlife (we see him everywhere lately), the world’s most famous male porn star is not only the nicest guy we’ve ever met, but he’s charming even when he’s being risqué. While tirelessly posing with BPM partiers who seemed to think he was a Mickey Mouse–like photo op, he told us tame yet funny jokes about his “schmeckter.” Learning a new word for weenie, from Ron Jeremy no less — now that’s cool! Look for RJ in an upcoming National Lampoon flick called Homo Erectus (a comedy about cavemen) with Ali Larter, Tom Arnold and David Carradine. There’s a clip on his MySpace page, and it actually looks pretty funny — and R-rated, i.e., no schmeckter shots.


SECRETS AND HIGHS

While we’re usually pretty content to wait for a film ’til it comes to Netflix, there are certain movies that are more like events (Sex and the City, The Dark Knight), during which the theater atmosphere is part of the whole experience. This isn’t just true for blockbusters, though. Sometimes it’s purely about subject matter and the fans it will attract, as with What We Do Is Secret. The movie about the Germs officially opens in New York on 08/08/08 (a symbolic date, which writer-director-superfan Rodger Grossman brought to our attention, because of all the circles in it) and seeing it in L.A., especially if you’re from here, is sure to be surreal. (It opens at the Nuart on August 22.) By the way, August 8 is also the opening day of the circle-logo’d Olympic Games! If you don’t know why circles are important here, you aren’t a Germs fan, but you will learn all about it in Grossman’s loving biopic about departed singer Darby Crash and his bandmates Lorna Doom, Pat Smear and Don Bolles. At a screening party last Thursday hosted by Candor Entertainment and our pal Heidi Richman, we got to chat with Grossman about his movie, which not only depicts the band members and local characters of the era, including Brendan Mullen and Rodney Bingenheimer, but also famed L.A. venues such as Oki Dog, the Roosevelt Hotel (when it was a dump) and the Whisky (when it was cool). We also spoke with Noah Segan, who plays Don Bolles (“the comic relief”) and the star, Shane West, about the movie and the band who’ve been rebirthed from it. What started out as a fun jam session with West fronting the original Germs at the wrap party (which we saw and were surprisingly impressed by) a few years ago has turned into a slew of semiregular reunion gigs. And despite naysayers that include NOFX’s Fat Mike and Jello Biafra, West, a musician long before he was an actor, says fan response has been extremely positive. Bolles, who signed posters at the party and plugged his Tuesday-night Club Ding-A-Ling at Hyperion Tavern, seems to be having a good time. Wanna judge for yourself? The new Germs will be playing some August shows to help hype the film, including the Warped Tour, the Echo and a certain street festival in its vicinity, which we can’t reveal because, at least for now, they’re — fittingly — listed as “secret guests.”


GLOBETROTTERS

There’s plenty of Germs-related content at Punkglobe.com, the online version of the old SF/currently L.A.-based punk zine helmed by White Trash Debutantes singer Ginger Coyote. Ginger, along with pals Tequila Mockingbird, Meri St. Mary, Pauley Perrette, Brandon Cruz and a roomful of the most colorfully seasoned L.A. scenesters we’ve seen in one place at one time in a long time, gathered last Sunday night at the groovy new Vine Bar to celebrate Punk Globe’s 30th anniversary (kinda makes BPM seem like a baby, huh?). Props to Coyote for keeping the raw punk-zine genre alive online, and here’s to 30 more years of crawling, brawling and mauling on the Web and in the streets. Oi! See our slideshow on laweekly.com Friday for the Punk Globe pile-up, the Secret screening and the 2 Live craziness.

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