The “Stop SB 48” campaign may be doing its darndest to shield California youth from the horrors of learning about gay and lesbian contributions to history, but the religious bigots behind it are bugs under the shoe of the L.A. Board of Education.

Yesterday, board member Steve Zimmer out-gayed the rest of the state's school districts — even San Francisco Unified; woot woot! — with the state's first solid plan to implement SB 48.

Under his resolution, all schools within LAUSD must do the following in their classrooms within three months:

  • Promote positive images of LGBT individuals.
  • Make available age-appropriate LGBT inclusive curriculum for elementary and secondary schools.
  • Require that newly adopted social studies materials include positive representations of LGBT and persons with disabilities.
  • Include LGBT sensitivity in outreach, education, and training for students, parents, and staff.
  • Remind staff of their duty to ensure that all students are safe and affirmed on campus, and to proactively intervene with acts of bias, harassment or bullying that they see, including, but not limited to LGBT-biased language and bullying.
  • Implement for all staff a training specifying legal responsibilities, effective practices, and concerns unique to LGBT individuals, similar to the district's child abuse module.

LAUSD's human relations coordinator, Judy Chiasson, tells the LA Daily News elementary-schoolers with same-sex parents will now “be allowed to make two Mother's or Father's Day cards without questions or concerns being raised by teachers.”

Well aware that all this mandatory, yet dauntingly existential, alternative lifestyle-embracing will probably go unaddressed by teachers and administrators until the last possible second, Zimmer also included a clause requiring semi-new Superintendant John Deasy to “report back to the Board on the status of, and plan for, implementation of each point in the above resolution within 60 days.”

He smartly based the urgency of the resolution on the need to crack down on schoolkid bullying — a darling of liberal media that's equally impossible for the other side to oppose.

“Anti-LGBT language and bullying targeting both LGBT and non-LGBT individuals are pervasive and have resulted in harassment, hate crimes, suicides, killings, and other tragedies,” reads the resolution.

(Cases in point: Seth Walsh, a 13-year-old from Tehachapi who committed suicide in 2010 after being bullied at school for being gay, and Larry King, who was shot dead by a classmate for wearing heels and makeup to his Oxnard high school.)

We'd like to see “Stop SB 48” argue with that. Somehow a middle-America anecdote of a second-grader coming home with a “diversity bookbag” doesn't hit quite as hard:

More laughs abound at stopsb48.com.

[@simone_electra/swilson@laweekly.com]

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