I punish thee with hella traffic

I punish thee with hella traffic

Updated after the jump: The beginning of the end FLASH FOOD warnings until 6 p.m. (this includes downtown L.A.).

Constantly updated with traffic conditions, evacuations and the best in emergency rescues. Originally posted at 8:30 a.m.

If you live in the Antelope Valley, you probably already know that you got the worst of the street flooding last night. Full list of closures after the jump. (Sit tight: This end-of-the-world weather will give way to “mostly sunny” conditions Thursday and Christmas Eve. What can we say — the gods are fickle.)

There's some good news in Pomona: The freeway interchange connecting the 10 West to both directions of the 57 has reopened after a long night of crazy debris/landslides.

The 5 North near Oso Parkway, however, is the new hotspot for potholes, and the Pacific Coast Highway is still closed between Malibu and Oxnard, with no end in sight. The rest:

SAN GABRIEL VALLEY

• Durfee Avenue from Santa Fe Avenue to Rosemead Boulevard

• San Gabriel Boulevard from Rosemead Boulevard to Plaza Drive

ANTELOPE VALLEY

• Angeles Forest Highway and nearby roads in the San Gabriel Mountains

• Avenue I from 90th Street East to 140th Street East

• Avenue J from 90th Street East to 140th Street East

• Avenue K from 90th Street East to 140th Street East

• Avenue N from 50th Street East to 7th Street East

• Avenue Q from 145th Street East to 180th Street East

• Avenue O from 105th Street East to 150th Street East

• Avenue S from Longview Street to 165th Street East

• Avenue T from Longview Road to 165th Street East

• Big Rock Creek Road in the five miles south of Valyermo Road

• Fort Tejon Road from 235th Street East to Antelope Highway

• Palmdale Boulevard from 150th Street East to Longview Road

• 40th Street East from Avenue P to Avenue N

• 70th Street East from Palmdale Boulevard Boulevard to Avenue N

• 120th Street East from Avenue H to Avenue I

• 145th Street East from Avenue Q to Avenue O

• 150th Street East from Avenue M to Avenue M-12

EVERYWHERE ELSE

On the 210 West by the Rose Bowl, a vehicle and semi that recently crashed into each other are blocking at least one lane. Check back for updates of road conditions around the county.

8:50 A.M.

Only one of the 200-plus residents told to evacuate La Canada Flintridge and La Crescenta yesterday afternoon actually did so. So far, they haven't regretted that decision; however, some random geologists told City News Service that if rain starts to fall at a half-inch an hour as predicted, mudslides will be inevitable. [Evacuation center: Holy Redeemer Church, 2411 Montrose Ave. in Montrose.]

Cars sitting still for two-and-a-half hours on the 241 North have finally been re-directed south on the 133 and allowed to take the long way to work and go sit in their cubicles instead. Pretty much all lanes involved are now going the opposite direction to accommodate the blockage. The really messed-up part: You still have to pay the toll!

Caltrans is still all over those 5 North potholes, blocking multiple lanes between the 10 and 110 exits. Try not to take out your rain rage on the cone dudes; they're just doing their job.

So far, overall, “THIS IS THE BIG ONE” predictions from yesterday evening have petered out anticlimactically. Yes, honey, you still have to go to school.

Here's a handy up-to-the-minute traffic map, courtesy of CBS Los Angeles.

9:25 A.M.

Any road heading into East L.A. is going to be a slow-go. An especially high number of collisions have been reported in Pasadena.

Firefighters are trying to rescue someone who reportedly fell into the river just east of the Ventura freeway. Move along, rubberneckers. Nothing to see here but an alleged victim of the elements, flailing around in the Los Angeles River's dangerously rising waters.

Silverado Canyon is currently being evacuated. Still, L.A. County has not received Schwarzenegger's “state of emergency” status call — Orange County, and especialy Laguna Beach, is getting hit much worse by this freak SoCal rainstorm, based on reports by rescue workers. The storm arrived much further south than was originally expected, and is currently on a northeast track through Riverside and San Bernardino.

One firefighter shares a story on KNX: A vehicle that flew off the 5 at Jamboree into a water channel this morning actually called 911 as he was floating/sinking in the muck. It was a rough rescue, but had a happy ending.

KNX news radio reports “very tough conditions” on the 91 West from “McKinley into Santa Ana canyon.”

10 A.M.

91 East and West are stopped up near Green River Road by flooding and a mudslide reported on eastbound side.

Roads around the Whittier Narrows Dam in the San Gabriel Valley are finally all reopened.

12 P.M.

The Station Fire burn area has been issued a flash-food warning until 1 p.m. San Juan Capistrano is also seeing its share of floods — in fact, the ground is so saturated at this point that many residents are clearing the area just in case. La Canada reports a quarter-inch of rain in the last 15 minutes.

But in the end, the storm moved over Los Angeles without leaving the grave extent of damage that was predicted last night. (Keep in mind, though, that mudslides are actually more likely in the weeks following such a flood.)

Laguna Beach and San Diego ended up receiving the brunt of the storm: Downtown LB is a total muckpile, and SD's Mission Valley has floods reaching levels of six feet. So yeah… our potholes were nothin'.

5 P.M.

The latest word from the National Weather Service is FLASH FLOOD through South Central and the Valley. Recommendations: “Move to higher ground immediately.”

Flash flood warning continues across South Central Los Angeles County in Southwest California… This includes the cities of… Sierra Madre… Monterey Park… Glendale… Pasadena… and downtown Los Angeles…

At 4:28 p.m. PST… Doppler radar indicated heavy rainfall continuing across much of the warning area… On a line from downtown Los Angeles northward to the foothills of the San Gabriel Mountains. Rainfall rates in excess of .50 inches per hour have been common… With reports of major roadway flooding across the Los Angeles metro area. The heavy rainfal without significant runoff in expected across portions of the warning area through 6 p.m.

Locations in the warning include but are not limited to Sierra Madre… Monterey Park… Glendale… Pasadena… and downtown Los Angeles.

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