The foul-mouthed chef is bringing his hit UK TV show to Los Angeles, with a live one-hour special airing on Tuesday, December 15, at 9 p.m., during which he'll demonstrate how to prepare a 1970s-inspired three-course meal.

If you've missed today's deadline to enter to appear on the show via webcam from your own kitchen, you probably dodged a bullet. As well as a lengthy questionnaire (Sample query: “Are you a fan of Gordon Ramsay? Please explain”), each applicant had to submit a photo and video of themselves.

And in any case, who needs Gordon poking fun of them as they toil over their hot stoves, all sweaty palms and flopping hairdos, in front of three hundred million people? Even on paper, this man is scary. According to the web page, which also has details of the ingredients required, “Chef Ramsay guarantees that you'll be able to cook three delicious dishes in one hour if you just do what he says.” (Our italics.)

So what exactly is on the menu? First up is Angel Hair Pasta with Shrimp, Chili Peppers and Tomatoes, followed by Steak Diane with Sautéed Potatoes and Peas, and Tiramisu for dessert.

Hardly groundbreaking, and it's a shame he's not doing a curry theme or, given the timing, a full-on Christmas dinner. But we'll take a free lesson with one of the most acclaimed chefs in the world any day.

LA Weekly