Dear zit-having, computer-programming, getting-your-asses-kicked-at-school teens: Sorry. We know life sucks, but just think, the geeks shall inherit the Earth. Someday you will be rolling deep in Apple stock and you'll have to use motherboards just to pry the chicks off you.

And science, she's breaking your way. This revenge life we speak of might come sooner than expected.

UCLA scientists announced this week that …

… Doctors soon may have a new weapon against zits: a harmless virus living on our skin that naturally seeks out and kills the bacteria that cause pimples.

Holy devirginator.

The discovery by UCLA and University of Pittsburgh researchers was published yesterday in the journal mBio. That's big news.

We're sure the makers of Proactiv aren't too happy. But they shouldn't worry too much.

Basically, the academics found that Propionibacterium acnes, a bacterium that can trigger acne, can be shot down by the family of viruses known as “P. acnes phages.”

Laura Marinelli, a UCLA postdoctoral researcher and author on the study:

We know that sex hormones, facial oil and the immune system play a role in causing acne; however, a lot of research implicates P. acnes as an important trigger. Sometimes they set off an inflammatory response that contributes to the development of acne.

But … since most people naturally have this virus — “P. acnes phages” — on their skin, the question is why some dorks still get acne.

That's the part they're still working on. UCLA:

The research team plans to isolate the active protein from the P. acnes virus and test whether it is as effective as the whole virus in killing acne bacteria. If laboratory testing proves successful, the researchers will study the compound's safety and effectiveness in combating acne in people.

So, you still have time, Proactiv.

[@dennisjromero / djromero@laweekly.com / @LAWeeklyNews]

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